Monday 9 November 2009

Jobs at Telegraph

Midget Wrestlers Murdered by Fake Hookers

Friday, 3rd July 2009

I defy you to find a better story today. Sad, obviously for the tiny wrestlers and their fans, but pure, unadulterated, newspaper gold for everyone else. We need more details but, by the looks of it anyway, this has the potential to be the story of the year...

Two professional midget wrestlers have been found dead in a low-rent hotel room in Mexico City.

La Parkita (Little Death) and Espectrito Jr - in real life brothers Alberto and Alejandro Jiménez - had been entertaining two prostitutes on the night of their death.

Police beileve the women gave the pair, both 35, a fatal drugs overdose before fleeing with their belongings.

Witnesses saw two females leaving the hotel room shortly before the bodies of Espectrito Jr and La Parkita, who fought wearing a skeleton costume, were discovered by a cleaner.

She found the pair laid out on their beds.

Police are interviewing two suspects but believe the wrestlers were dosed with a lethal combination of alcohol and eye drops.

Prosecutor Miguel Angel Mancera said that gangs of female robbers are experienced at using drugs to knock men out and rob them, but they may have used too strong a dose.

Like I say, this is the sort of caper newspapers were invented for. I hope everyone is sending their best guys to Mexico in what should be a mad scramble to get the full story... We need Wenlock Jakes to be covering this.

 


Filed under: Mexico (3 more articles) , Newspapers (200 more articles)

Blogs: Martin Bright | Susan Hill | Melanie Phillips | Coffee House | Faith Based

Actions: Print this article  |  Email to a friend  |  Permalink   |   Comments (9)

Post this entry to:   del.icio.us | Digg | Newsvine | NowPublic | Reddit

Comments Post comment

Jeremy

July 3rd, 2009 6:47pm Report this comment

"Two professional midget wrestlers have been found dead in a low-rent hotel room in Mexico City."

That first sentence is very nearly perfect, isn't it?

I also love the expression "...entertaining two prostitutes..." What does "entertaining" two prostitutes constitute, I wonder? How does one "entertain" two prostitutes? To what - or with what - does one "entertain" them?

"Police beileve the women gave the pair, both 35, a fatal drugs overdose before fleeing with their belongings."

At this point, that sounds almost par for the course...^^

"Police are interviewing two suspects but believe the wrestlers were dosed with a lethal combination of alcohol and eye drops."

A lethal combination of alchohol and eye drops! Whatever - one wonders - is that? Do you squeeze the substance in the eye drops into the alchohol? Or do you take the alchohol orally and then have whatever substance is contained in the eye drops squeezed into your eyes? How very exotic! I've certainly never tried that one before...Is this a popular form of recreational drug-taking in Mexico? As John Junor used to say: I think we should be told.

And the source of the story? Well I never! It's The Daily Mail...^^

Verity

July 4th, 2009 1:30am Report this comment

They are funny because they are Mexican. Is that it? If they were British dwarves, or Aussie Abo dwarves, or, God forbid, Pakistani dwarves, or African dwarves, this wouldn't have been written up as light entertainment, would it?

It appears that two people were murdered.

Kevyn Bodman

July 4th, 2009 11:44am Report this comment

Verity,
Thank you for that comment.

This is not an amusing story.

James Hodson

July 4th, 2009 7:17pm Report this comment

Kevyn,

I believe Verity questioned the reason behind the thrust of the article: "this has the potential to be the story of the year" and "this is the sort of caper newspapers were invented for".

I think you've fallen into the trap of thinking every statement that mentions race must necessarily be racialist.

Along these lines, reading one chapter of Peter Hitchens' The Broken Compass may be useful.

Jeff

July 4th, 2009 7:35pm Report this comment

"The sort of caper newspapers were invented for". Really?

I think your amusement at this story is in poor taste I'm afraid Alex, not that we all don't have the same errors of judgement from time to time.

If this same sad tale had happened in the UK I doubt you'd be claiming it was potentially "the story of the year".

Lee Jakeman

July 4th, 2009 9:03pm Report this comment

"I hope everyone is sending their best guys to Mexico in what should be a mad scramble to get the full story."

Called VULTURES aren't they?

Alex Massie

July 5th, 2009 12:36am Report this comment

Verity/Kevyn/Jeff/Lee:

Gosh, I didn't mean to offend anyone, nor even to make light of what is doubtless a grim time for these tiny wrestlers' families and, for that matter, fans.

But I'm afraid that there *is* something intrinsically funny about midget wrestlers. Add fake hookers and death by eye drops to the mixture and you have a tabloid story for the ages.

I thought my post was pretty clearly somewhat tongue-in-cheek but perhaps that didn't come across in the way I would have hoped. Still, calling for Wenlock Jakes - a character from "Scoop" after all - to cover the story might have been thought a hint...

Newspapers have always reveled in tales of the grotesque. This is no exception.

James Hodson

July 5th, 2009 2:27am Report this comment

Damn, Alex,

Does that mean I actually have a point for a change?

Scary stuff.

Robert Odom

July 6th, 2009 3:55pm Report this comment

Without doubt, the authorities will discover that the alcohol and eye drops were smuggled in from the US, so we need an alcohol/eye drops ban in the US to protect Mexican midgets.

Post comment

Back to top

About Alex Massie

Tag Cloud

Search this blog

Alex Massie's blog archive

sponsored links

Spectator recommends

Spectator classifieds

      GASCONY

GASCONY, SW France, near Condom-en-Armagnac 13th Century stone house, 21st Century luxury for 12 in 5 en-suites. 50 acres +

BIG SAND STEEL BAND

IF YOU ARE PLANNING A CHAMPAGNE RECEPTION and looking for some light entertainment, you can now hire London's busiest steel

BOSC LEBAT, Tarn et Garonne.

BOSC LEBAT, SW France. Only 45 minutes from Toulouse Airport with daily flights from most provincial airports avoiding the horrors