Unaccountably, he makes no mention of the dread word ‘whatever’. ‘Whatever’ has become a catch-all response, signifying utter indifference to your interlocutor’s point of view, disregard for right or wrong and a refusal to co-operate in further discussion. It is much beloved of Americans and features in all their annoying, screwball film comedies: a — presumably — ironic song called ‘We’re in the United States of Whatever’ was a recent hit. Some young people now find its three syllables too demanding, preferring instead the silent riposte of forming a ‘W’ with their thumbs and first fingers. ‘Whatever’ is to conversation as Harpic is to germs in a lavatory.

Nevertheless, I don’t share Stephen Miller’s pessimism about the future of conversation. It has survived telegrams and gramophones, the wireless and then television: it will doubtless survive all our current gizmos too. No fax or text can replicate the gaiety, the spontaneity, the sudden flights of fancy which make face-to-face conversation so delightful. Nothing will ever topple laughter and the love of friends as among life’s chief pleasures.

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