What are your predictions for 2012?

Axstane

I know this is all a bit of fun but in what way will UKIP become the third biggest party? By MPs? By Councillors? We cannot count the MEPs as none of them actually represent any constituency but only regions - one of mine is an Argentinian who lives in Spain. EU elections are a joke as is the EU.

As to Climate Change [its new name as the others have been scorned] it is a new religion and will not die even if there were a disclosure that it was all made up - look at Scientology or Homeopathy for verification.

Russell

The 'Trade Union Modernisation Fund' will not be scrapped and continue funnelling taxpayers £millions to the labour party via the trade unions.

No 'Pilgrims' will be made redundant, and will continue to be paid £millions by taxpayers to carry out anti government labour & trade union promotion.

The electorate will not be allowed to give their opinion about EU membership, costing taxpayers £billions per year.

MP's will continue to fleece taxpayers with their 'expenses' and 'fact finding' jollies costing taxpayers £millions per year.

Members of the HoL will continue fleecing taxpayers with 'attendance fees', 'fact finding' jollies and 'expenses' costing taxpayers £millions per year.

Quangos will not be 'culled', costing taxpayers £billions per year.

Councils will continue to pay 'executives' exorbitant salaries/pensions/payoffs and employ thousands of 'diversity officers'etc. costing taxpayers £millions per year.

Taxpayers will continue to be stuffed and the people who regard themselves as 'elite' will carry on living the high life at taxpayers expense.

sinosimon

Jesus has his second coming, being born in the car-park of the Berlaymont in Brussels. Van Rompuy, Merkozy and Barroso offer gifts of a promise to pay the bearer in gold, frankish nonsense, and nightmare.

They then explain the current Euro situation, to which the infant messiah replies 'Jesus Wept! I may be able to walk on water - but this?'
After some thought he brightens up and says 'Right - I'm going to need five loaves and two fish.....'

JohnOfEnfeld

Chris Huhne will disappear from front-line politics and hopefully will be replaced by a carbon life-form who is not quite as insane.

PayDirt

1 Radical weather patterns destroy crops leading to worldwide famine, millions die
2 Deadly superbug mutation immune to antibiotics kills 4billion people
3 Electricity grids collapse, half the world in darkness
4 Oil price to climb above $500 per barrel
5 Huge failures of satellite communications, mobile phone networks collapse, etc
6 Nuclear bombs go off in Middle East killing millions instantly
7 Inflation rate climbs above 50%, Govt scraps index-linking
8 US declares war with China over natural resources dispute
9 Tsunami destroys Japan
10 New Zealand disappears under the Pacific Ocean
11 Boris Johnson repeals the London Low Emission Zone for vans but enforces it for cars over 3 years old.

strapworld

Axstane. Eugenics!

Predictions.

Cameron to stand down as Prime Minister when his ratings slump because he signs the new treaty without a referendum or reference to Parliament.

Battle for the heart of the Tory Party between Osborne, Hague, May and Pickles sees Eric Pickles emerge as the winner!

Ed Balls returns to the party of his youth and is promoted to the cabinet.

Mrs Balls is elected leader of the Labour Party and newspapers are full of speculation of a husband and wife leading two seperate parties.

Kenneth Clarke finally admits he is a socialist and crosses the floor.

Nick Clegg is appointed an EU Commissioner. He leads on Democracy in the EU!

Vince Cable (Dr) emerges as the new leader of the Lib Dems and immediately announces a new initiative. A Lib Dem formation dancing team (to get the party to dance in step).

The Sun discovers that Alec Salmon is actually English. He is banished from Scotland.

A happy and prosperous New Year to everyone (especially trevors den)

Sean Haffey

1. People start to realise that global warming isn't a yes/no answer but a matter of probabilities.

2. The probabilities increasingly favour man-made global warming being a significant element of climate change.

3. The first substantial building development under the Government's National Planning Policy Framework turns out to be a 5,000 dwelling town opposite David Cameron's Oxfordshire home.

4. A breakaway wing of the Liberal Democrats starts a party called the Social Democrats.

5. With UKIP's popularity growing, the May council elections see a surge in LibDem wins, caused by a split in the right-wing vote.

6. Lady Thatcher passes away. Over 1 million people attend her funeral.

7. Two dozen Conservative MPs break away from the parliamentary caucus, starting the T-Party (Thatcher Party.)

8. Opinion polls show that all the T-Party MPs will lose their seats in the next election as they split the right wing vote.

9. The T-Party dissolves "in the national interest" and merges with UKIP.

10. National opinion polls show all the new UKIP MPs will lose their seat at the next election as they split the right-wing vote.

11. A scurrilous rumour is put about that David Cameron has ordered members of the SAS to trail a certain Mr Farage at the May local elections, carrying surface-to-air missiles.

12. Nigel Farage retires from politics for "personal reasons".

13. The UK is expelled from the EU after the Prime Minister calls for an audit of finances before any more money is paid by the UK.

14. Osborne announces a 50p/litre drop in duties and texes on fuel.

15. Cameron announces a snap general election.

16. Two dozen UKIP MPs announce they are joining the Tories "in the national interest".

17. Public sector trade unions announce a one day strike for the day of the election...

18. ... leading to a dramatic fall in Labour's support as enraged private sector voters turn out in their droves and vote Tory.

19. David Cameron is returned to power with over 450 MPs.

20. Subscriptions to the Speccie soar

and we all live happily ever after.

fergus pickering

I like your style, Sean. Climate-change stuff is just one of your delightful eccentricities.

daniel maris

1. The mainstream media recognises that there has been a big breakthrough in cold fusion (aka low nuclear energy reaction) technology and that we can now free ourselves of dependency on oil and gas for energy.

2. At least one commentator on matters economic will finally dare to mention that if your population is growing by 0.5% that represents a REDUCTION in your per capita GDP if your economy only grows 0.4%.

3. Turkey, Egypt, Tunisia, Libya and (possibly) Syria (now post-Assad) form a
pact - which becomes known as "the Caliphate pact" expressing a desire for global Islamic unity.

Ant

With the accepted political alignment increasingly stretched and frayed, the argument that UKIP polls in third place is credible. Instead, however, 2012 will be the year in which a "new" centrist political party is born and captures the imagination, spearheaded by a handful of high-profile figures with past or present alignments to each of the main three political parties.

Hugo

The Spectator will shock readers by updating its byline picture of Rod Liddle.

TrevorsDen

I predict a lot of people will make a lot of predictions and get them wrong. Including me.

Hexhamgeezer

1) After Clegg threatens to pull out, Cameron agrees to bring Labour into the Coalition. Covered wagons seen encircling Parliament.

2) Chancellor Balls takes us into the Euro as it is in the Eurozone's and therefore our, best interests.

3) Diane Abbott and Eric Pickles caught dogging in abandoned coal depot outside Mexborough. "He was showing me his tattoos" sez a blushing but uncontrite Diane.

4) New 'core' Euro, the 'EURhine' launched with severe penalties for states extracting too much.

5) Minimum pricing for alcohol introduced. "It's the Big Sobriety in action" gurns Cameron.

Hexhamgeezer

6) ...quickly followed by minimum pricing for cigarettes. "Its the Cig Society in action" coughs Lansley.

7) Eastern European smuggling increases tenfold in response. "Its the Big Sobranie-ty in action" says a Mr V Putin.

8) Unemployed catering staff to be encouraged to set up their own takeaway businesses in new 'Back to Wok' initiative.

9) There is no number 9

10) New Spectator editor announces "AGW is total bollocks, unrestricted immigration has been the biggest disaster for this country in it's history, the Government needs to reduce the public payroll by 30%, and unrestricted abortion is an affront when we do not have the death penalty for murderers.

Hexhamgeezer

Baroness Warsi says "I predict a roti"

Verity

Writing or saying the words "vibrant immigrant community" will be made into a criminal offence - unless the writer/speaker can prove that he really meant it.

Verity

More seriously, UKIP will become the third party and, with the attendant increased publicity which the media will not be able to avoid providing, will become the second party within one year after that.

teledu

1) Cameron calls a referendum on the UK's membership of the EU. An IN/OUT vote.

2)The re-introduction of Grammar schools will be encouraged, with funding from central government.

3) Gareth Bale realises he is really English and gets special dispensation to play for England from now on.

4) England win the European whatever-it-is in Poland/Ukraine this summer.

5) the UK withdraws from the ECHR as a prelude to:-

6) Swift deportation of any non-UK citizen found guilty of crime.

7) State benefits to be withdrawn from those found guilty of crime.

8)Gordon Brown impeached and charged with treason.

9) Flat tax rate introduced.

10) MPs expenses to be limited to say, £4k per year.

11) Cap placed on final pensions for public sector workers at level of national average take home pay. Anyone who wants to obtain a higher pension must make their own contributions to private schemes. (This to include MPs.)

12)National Service to be re-introduced. Any male over 18 and under 35 unemployed for 24 months must enlist.

13) All prisons to introduce toughened regimes. A ban on dope / fags to be rigoursly enforced.

14) Boris Johnson accepts place in Strictly Come Dancing

15) GB tops Gold medal winners in Olympics.

16) The Guardian folds

michael

2012 - isn't this supposed to be the end of all things?

...It's plausibly ONS so it has to be.

They will need to think long and hard whether to issue their corrections in advance.

Austin Barry

That Ed Miliband returns to the mother ship at Roswell and is transported back to Planet Dazed Idiocy where he can enter, and probably win, the Interplanetary Gurning Competition.

Sean O'Hare

@teledu

You're pulling my leg, that's just a wish list isn't it?

Cynic

The euro limps along being continually patched up and bailed out because nobody will admit to the failure of the vanity project. The EU goes into depression.

More GB QE leads to inflation taking off, but interest rates are kept low and savers and pensioners are well and truly shafted.

Alec Salmond decides "the time is not yet right" to hold the referendum on Scottish independence (because in polls fewer than 25% express preference for leaving the union).

Hugo Chav

UK debt serfs start to realise that the BoE and Treasury have enslaved them in mortgages on overvalued houses.

John

The first major party to promise an in/out referendum on Europe within 6 months of taking office, will win the next election.

Douglas Carter

What will happen in 2012? Like the last words of the late Colonel Quadaffi of Libya ...'Buggered if I know'...

Eddie

1) a UK property crash
2) a Euro crash
3) a European banking crash
4) More vibrant shoplifting riots
6) a Royal Funeral
7) an Islamic terrorist attack after the Olympics
8) The Olympics being as boring as it always is with lots of drugged up Chinamen winning
9)An assasination of a famous person by a loonie
10) More China muscle-flexing and demands for the longnoses to kowtow to the master race

And the usual wars, famine, death and destruction - all funded and caused by overseas aid and overpopulation

Oh, and the price of everything will go up up up - especially that of anti-depressants!

Verity

Teledu - What a great wish list!

The only prediction I would add is: Speaker Bercow is ejected from his booster seat and replaced with an intelligent Conservative (or UKIP) life form.

And David Cameron is, sadly, the victim of a cabal of savvy, ambitious Conservatives and removed from Downing St. Nigel Farage is spotted helping to load the furniture van.

salieri

Spectator sacks Korski.

EC

ConDemLab cabal continue to piss down our backs whilst telling us it's only raining.

EC

Korski appointed Editor as Fraser Nelson moves to 'The Sunday Sun.'

Verity

Austin Barry 3:56 - Funny.

In fact, this is a very funny thread. It quite cheered me up.

Verity

The London Olympics are moved to somewhere in the Middle East after a national UK referendum, and the jihadis are obliged to try to get refunds or reroute their tickets and lose some air miles.

Noa

Following the annual summer riots the Islamic provinces of Bradford, Dewsbury, Burnley and Blackburn secede from the United Kingdom, formerly declaring themselves to be the Confederate Caliphate.

Following swift formal acceptance by Westminster the FCO establishes the UK embassy opposite the massive Ashton Towers, housing Lord Straw, the EU's plenipotentiary, in Blackburnistan.

The Caliphate's Majlis swiftly implements Sharia law and the BBC proudly broadcasts the first mass public beheading of 20 prominent local drug dealers in the Eurostretcher store on Market Street. This was followed by the public stoning of 16 mini-skirted chavs arrested for lewd and drunken behaviour during a Hen night the previous evening.

In November the Coalition government enters into negotiations to re-unite the country under the rule of the Emir Bin Cameron, subject in turn to the Grand Sultan Van Rumpey.
Negotiations are swiftly and successfully completed by 18 Muharram - Safar 1434 A.H. (31st December under the superseded Gregorian calendar).

Craig Strachan

I'm with the Mayans, so I predict that the global debt crisis will end by Dec 21st, 2012 - along with the euro, the coalition, the monarchy, Eastenders and everything else.

JDR

1. Iran tests a nuclear device
2. Shares in a large web=based company plummet after their system crashes irrecoverably.

Magnolia

David Cameron will show that he has an eye for the public mood by growing a distinguished beard like all the other 'right on' Tories.
While he's at it he might also give up the hair dye and go a dignified silver grey like all the other 'right on' oldies.
He might as well also do a WH and get rid of the public (careful there) school hair which he clings on to in desperation to hide his bald spot. He might thus join all the other 'right-on and sexy' brainy baldies who are so clever that they need minimal time in the grooming arena in order to fit in all that thinking.
What a leader he will become!
He will also hire a 'hecteron' alerter to sharpen up his thinking and actions and either myself or any one of the usual sweeties who regularly post here would do an admirable job.
Apart from all that the Euro will break up and we will be the first to leave the EU and rationing will be back before next Xmas.
May your God go with you into the New Year as DA always used to say.

Martin Harrison

UKIP will become the third largest party.Nigel Farage is awesome,he is the second highest viewed uk politician on the web.Above Tony Blair and Thatcher!.Only the incredible Dan Hannan has had more views. Following the Cameron Veto, the issue of Europe will only increasingly become a thorn in the coalitions side. A pact with UKIP before a future general election, with the promise of a Referendum, will leave the field clear.As for 2012 Farage is a rising star, and a massive problem for the Tories

Ostrich (occasionally)

President Ahmedinejad, on being shown Iran's first nuclear warhesd, "And what does this button do?"

Microseconds later, a large mushroom cloud obliterates much of Iran.

Verity

Craig Strachan, it's 26 December next year and the world is not going to end. Mayan astromers worked through one entire rotation of our planetary system. As, unbeknownst to them, did the Hindus 3,000 years ago, who calculated the exact same date. In our terminology, 26 December, 2012.

What is going to happen? Nothing at all. It is just the end of one cycle.

What is astounding is that two different peoples, thousands of miles apart and their existence unknown to one another, worked out the same mathematical calculations and produced the same date, out of all the dates in those thousands of years.

Two absolutely brilliant peoples.

disenfranchised

@ magnolia....

i miss dave allen. taken way too early.....

Axstane

Verity - it is alright for you - they probably don't have Boxing Day in Mexico. Here it is an important public holiday and I would hate to miss the sales.

By the way when they worked out that exact date did they use the Julian or the Gregorian calendar? - makes a difference of 12 days you know. Can't remember which way round.

Herbert Thornton

During 2012, 95% of the people in the world (probably therefore including me - and of course you) die. Our deaths happen because somehow the new, deadly, airborne influenza virus escapes from the lab where it's now stored.

The continent with the biggest proportion of survivors is Africa, because black Africans consist (or so I've read) of something like 20 genetically different strains, some of which are likely to have extra resistance, whereas the people in rest of the world consist of only 2 strains, and the odds are that neither of them has much resistance.

paulg

I like Korski have the powers of Nostrodamus and I predict 2012:

Brazil will be the sixth largest economy in the World.

A place called the USA will endure.

A thing called a Tulip will grow in the ground and have a variety of colours.

A sea called the Atlantic Ocean will be tidal.

Kim Jong il will not be holding public office in North Korea anymore.

Christopher Hitchens now believes in God.

The European people are in the process of beggaring themselves trying to maintain a contradiction.

The Spectator obviously snaffled a crate of Pol Roger from the summer party, and it will all be gone by New Year.

All these things will come to pass, although I must hold a caveat about the great Leaders demise being a barr to holding public office in North Korea. In that respect we could learn from them, mortality should not be a prerequisite, only hubris and Greek logic, constrains us from an Oriental understanding of what is the truth. Imagine if we all elected Churchill to see us thru these times , everyone would feel a lot happier and the Conservative party would once again stand united. Boris could be his campaign manager.

E Hart

2012 Predictions

1) There will be recession in the UK, US and Eurozone (i.e. expansionary austerity will continue to be applied idiocy and a chronicle of a death foretold).

2) James Delingpole will come up with something incontrovertible from secondary sources. It will be: "I'm wrong." He won't except it.

3) Nick Clegg will talk rubbish.

4) David Cameron will do a good impersonation of a blathering bladder of piss on a stick.

5) Ed Miliband will provide further evidence of his and Nude Labour's inability to form a coherent alternative to the Coalition. Who said "nature abhors a vacuum"?

6) Nigel Farage will launch a thousand ciggies and UKIP will become a cancer on the Tory Party's electoral testicle[sic].

7) Priti Patel will manage a sentence without a cliche.

8) North Korea will continue to be North Korea.

9) Richard Dawkins will bring out another book entitled: "Darwin's Gravy Train."

10) Bullshit will continue to the world's fastest growing religion (as demonstrated by all of the former).

Heartless Curmudgeon

My Predictions?! - Bah! - my HOPES are

a. an end to the Global Warming Scam and the pathetic attempts by the H2B and his coterie to impose it on us through stealth fuel taxes

b. an end to mealy-mouthed justifications for throwing UK money into the maws of conniving scoundrels under cover of ‘Overseas Aid’

c. an end to the EUSSR, and UK involvement with it

d. for the H2B to receive such a series of shocks that they cause him to grow a spine, rebut the Limpid Dims and all their works, the Grouniad, and finally, to nail the BBC to the wall under close scrutiny.

However . . . as none of the preceding will come to pass, my predictions are that all the above will thrive.

James Sproule

Margaret Thatcher dies, the BBC runs lots of anti-Thatcher pieces to show “balance” and is stunned by the public anger at their approach.

UK inflation begins to rise alarmingly, stunning the Governor of the Bank of England and Gilt investors alike.

The Olympics prove to be less popular (and astronomically more expensive) than the Diamond Jubilee.

President Obama is re-elected as the Republican Party proves it could not organise a prayer in a church.

Greece leaves the euro, the scale of the subsequent economic collapse of the Greek economy stuns everyone.

Eddie

Yes, and if Greece goes down all the way, one wouldn't put it past their military to take over - which would show the EU to be the biggest sham in history, since it claims one major reason for its existence is the prevention of war, and let's face it, Greece was only invited to be a member of the club to stop its military squabbling with Turkey. Military coup in an EU country? It could well happen.

TGF UKIP

Nelson carps about Cameron
Tiberius carps about Nelson carping about Cameron
Verity carps about Tiberius carping about Nelson carping about Cameron
TrevorsDen carps about Verity carping about Tiberius carping about Nelson carping about Cameron
Austin Barry diffuses whole thing with a one liner - everybody falls about
Nelson professes his undying faith in his beloved Cam

paulg

People may pose the question: Churchill is dead, but as far as I know being alive is not a question for fitness to put yourself forward in a ballot.

Every Conservative association in the Country would welcome Churchill as their constituency MP.

And he is the only person who could stand a chance against Cameron. His hysterical cries of he is dead, will not influence the Tory faithful.

With Lord Sailsbury as the D.P,Francis Drake at the Admiralty, conservatism will never be beaten.

Noa.

The overthrow of the Saudi Royal family by Iran controlled extremists who subsequently establish an extremist theocracy.

Noa.

2. Following its threat to deprive the world of all oil supplies should it oppose the proclaimed pan national attack against Israel.

Noa.

3. A US led international peace keeping force lands and seizes key oil fields, declaring them to be under international protection.

Noa.

4.
Unstable states power is further curtailed by the worldwide seizure of their financial assets and the similar confiscation of business and property assets in the West, "pending the complete elimination of world terrorism".
(Hat tip Verity)

hepworth

After all the wish lists a prediction that is very likely to become reality.
The vast majority of the worlds population will experience conflict on a cataclysmic scale with British cities in flames (spreading throughout the country) due to race/ class conflict.
This will happen because the semi/secret cabal that really run our world have deemed it so.

Verity

Axestane - The Mayans used the Mayan calendar, which is in museums today, and the Hindus used the Hindu calendar. This was all done before anyone else had come up with a calendar.

Boxing Day is a uniquely British tradition and you are correct that it is not celebrated in Mexico, or anywhere in the rest of N America, or Central America or South America.

Verity

I have been saying for 20 years that we need to drill more, in more dependable countries, or develop new forms of energy. It it unbelievable that we have put ourselves in hock to a group of touchy primitives.

Verity

Paul G - Churchill is not the only person who could stand a chance against the tenth rate Cameron. Nigel Farage could probably oust him if there were an election tomorrow. Cameron doesn't inspire loyalty.

Robert Christopher

Shale gas will become topical:

http://www.thegwpf.org/energy-news/4646-dieter-helm-shale-gas-will-transform-europes-energy-roadmap.html

Noa.

And finally.

Johann Hari will fulfill his prediction by returning to the Independent as Editor in chief, supplanting the journalists' favourite for the post, the newly enobled Lord Liddle of Millwall.

Richard of Moscow

NATO will declare war on Monaco, and after a ten-week bombing campaign there will be a US-led ground invasion. However, after US troops suffer considerable homophobic, racist, and size-ist abuse from two Moroccan toilet cleaners, and Taki's threat to deploy tobacco smoke, a tearful Obama will announce on the Oprah show that a strategic withdrawal is underway.

paulg

verity@ Nigel Farage couldn’t even beat John Bercow, there is optimism, blind faith and then delusion.

I know there is a plentiful supply of mesculin in Mexico, and that must surely account for you skipping over the first two stages of hope.

Even my suggestion of putting forward Churchill’s name for election would be subject to the rampant cynicism in this Country, but with Boris as his advocate and cheerleader, the ingrained British spirit of giving everyone a fair go, albeit, their dead, should do the trick.

Even Richard of York and fat lad on a whore (more information than we need) would have to concede, that Churchill’s candidacy is a master stroke for the Tories.

dfd

Here's my predictions for BBC news coverage in 2012. Every day shall feature on item on one of the following;
1) Massive rioting in the Euro Zone, hopefully including France, caused by mass unemployment, tax hikes, and brutal cuts in pay and benefits imposed by Merkozy. No mention of the fact that these cuts exceed anything even dreamt of in the UK.
2) Footage of Sarkozy blaming the UK, The City and the US for all of the above.The BBC to identify the problem as our 'loss of influence' in the EU.
3) A new survey/report by a left-wing charity in the pages of the Guardian highlighting the tragic effects of 'cuts' in NHS spending. The BBC to ignore the figures on health spending in favour of interviewing sick people who blame the government.
4) Shockingly high youth unemployment in the UK, approaching half the level of that in southern Eurozone countries. To be accompanied by a Trade Unionist opposing UK exemptions from EU employment protection law, apprenticeships,workfare, internships, or anything that might actually put young people to work.
5) 'Worrying evidence' that Osborne's policy of spending cuts is not reducing the deficit, to be accompanied by a graph showing that Osborne has not actually cut spending at all. No reference to be made to the connection between these two facts.
5) An even-handed report on the impact of free schools on 'social cohesion', to be filmed at Eton College. Additional contributions by Polly Toynbee.
6) Horrified coverage of Fox News stance on US politics and elections. All US politicians and voters to be portrayed as gun-totin' fundamentalists, except Obama. To be followed by confirmation that said hillbillies are about to re-elect a black left-winger as their President.

Eddie

I PREDICT:

The election of a president of the USA who isn't a tub-thumping Christian - or even perhaps an atheist who doesn't believe a sky-pixie is on their side and guiding their missiles when they drop on innocent civilians and blow them to pieces.

Oh but now I'm just being a silly sausage - that was just my little joke... (The last head of the US atheist association was murdered for her beliefs of course - but isn't worshipped like that godly preachy fraud Martin Luther King Junior).

America will be electing a Mormon president instead in 2012 - one who believes some nutter from 150 years ago spoke to an angel who sent some extra messages from Gawd which the compilers of the Bible left out - including the one about how it's OK to have several very young wives, and other mucho weirdo stuff.

Well, that's alright then...

Augustus

The whole world will watch in horror as former French president Sarkozy is dragged from his retirement home by a lynch mob and kicked within an inch of his life. Ironically, it will be a passing SAS member who steps in to save his life. The British tabloids will have a field day with headlines such as The Sun's BRITAIN SAVES FRENCH PRESIDENT.

Cogito Ergosum

1. The Ministry of Education will announce that half our children are of below average intelligence, this being the fault of the previous government. A costly remedial programme will be started.

2. All dustbin collections will be cancelled after the MOD requisitions all dustbin lides in the absence of any other form of defence.

3. Mr Huhne's department, whether or not he is still there, will announce that all solar elecricity will be used to keep windmills going during the day. At night, the windmills will keep the solar panels going.

4. The BBC will make further economies owing to the non-increasing licence fee. News bulletins will be recycled at random to cut costs - and nobody will notice. Same with weather forecasts.

5. The Parliamentary authorities will insist that MPs fill in their own expenses forms, rather than hiring accountants to do it. This will weed out illiterate and innumerate MPS, causing a vast number of by-elections.

Herbert Thornton

Iran will detonate a nuclear bomb.

But it will be done N.Korean style, & with N. Korean assistance, very deep underground. This will enable naive western commentators to claim that it was just an accident in a conventional, deeply buried storage facility.

Some barmy mullah will even declare that it was an earthquake caused by the behaviour of immoral modern women.

Patriccia Shaw

Netanyahu will finally let his military have a go at the Nuclear Bunkers.

America will then do nothing.

Britain will use the opportunity to cosy back up to Sarkozy.

Hugo Chav

1. "Peak wealth" in the UK will become more apparent as the debt burden, a weak currency and expensive resources meld to sap the purchasing power of people (consumers).

2. The trend of, Cars--->Scooters--->Bicycles, will start as the cost of running a car hits the lower middle class harder.

3. The BoE will continue to print money to bailout the weak minded political elite and broken banks.

4. The "fall of Welfarism" will continue as the Social Democratic Model is no longer financially feasible.

5. There could be a Sterling crisis as the markets wake up to the UK's debt dynamics when economic growth is shown to be an illusion.

Leslie Graham

Global average temperatures will continue to rise.
Arctic Ice will continue to melt.
There will be another increase in extreme weather events.
Denialist cult devotees will remain ignorant of the most basic climate science.