Another Voice
Wednesday, 8th October 2008
Sit back and enjoy the world economic crisis in three minutes
Joe Citizen (to himself): Then mine must be worth at least £12. (To the Joneses) I’m asking £15 for mine now.
Joe and the Joneses continue bidding up the price of each other’s bricks until they close the deal at £100 for Joe’s small brick and £200 for the Joneses’ big one.
Jill Jones (to her husband): We’re buying for £100 and selling for £200 so we’ve got £100 to spend. Let’s invest in bricks — buy-to-let, maybe? We’re in a rising market here. EXEUNT the Joneses.
Joe Citizen (alone): As I’m selling for £100 and buying for £200, I’m short of £100. I’ll need a mortgage...
ENTER Mr Moneybags
Mr Moneybags: A mortgage, did you say? What’s your security?
Joe Citizen: The brick I’m buying from Mr and Mrs Jones.
Moneybags: What’s it worth?
Joe Citizen: About £200.
Moneybags: Surely not. Let’s ask. (Calls) Ms Dreamhomes! Can you do us a valuation?
ENTER: Ms Dreamhomes, accompanied by Messrs Ballpark-Estimate and Whatam-Ibid.
Ms Dreamhomes: Delighted. (Announces) What do you say, chaps?
More articles from: Matthew Parris | this section
Post this entry to: del.icio.us | Digg | Newsvine | NowPublic | Reddit
Advertisement
Should the Tories follow Frank Field’s lead and, in the…
Oh dear. I may have to write a book…
Consider this: barring the intervention of an usually malevolent deity,…
‘Say what you like about servicemen amputees,’ said the comedian…
If the devil is in the detail then Satan’s foremost…
Popular Blogger Posts
sponsored links
GASCONY
GASCONY, SW France, near Condom-en-Armagnac 13th Century stone house, 21st Century luxury for 12 in 5 en-suites. 50 acres +
BIG SAND STEEL BAND
IF YOU ARE PLANNING A CHAMPAGNE RECEPTION and looking for some light entertainment, you can now hire London's busiest steel
BOSC LEBAT, Tarn et Garonne.
BOSC LEBAT, SW France. Only 45 minutes from Toulouse Airport with daily flights from most provincial airports avoiding the horrors
Spectator Business | Apollo Magazine
Corporate | Advertising | Privacy | Terms
Spectator, 22 Old Queen Street, London, SW1H 9HP
All Articles and Content Copyright ©2009 by The Spectator | All Rights Reserved
Yvonne
October 9th, 2008 3:15pm Report this commentNo, it can't really be that bad, can it? Will Sheik I'veoilbelow have the last word?
Herbert Thornton
October 12th, 2008 7:04pm Report this commentYvonne -
Yes it can. Sheik I'veoilbelow corners the market in bricks and uses them to build another Mosque which he believes the most of the dramatis personae, including somebody called Rowan bin Williams, will soon obediently attend, though for some strange reason nobody in the congregation seems to be called Griffin.
Familiar Clown
October 12th, 2008 8:54pm Report this commentThe sometime stand-up comedian
Mr Brown, who got his first big break in 1997, also has a number of one man shows, including his own composition
One Man Wrecking Machine, under his belt along with many televison appearances.
Inspired by true events on movie screens
I am a one man wrecking machine.
Here in the present tense
Nothing makes sense.
Waiting for my moment to come
everything's come undone.
David Dzidzikashvili
December 13th, 2008 2:56pm Report this commentCurrent global financial crisis was a result of greed by large investment & financial institutions, CEOs and individual investors, whose policies dragged whole world down and resulted in inflation, unemployment, foreclosures and bankruptcies. The worst still yet to come in 2009. There is a need for more stable financial system that leaders around the world can agree on to guarantee long-term stability. In addition, the investors who personally were involved in the greed schemes that caused the economic chaos should be arrested and jailed for their involvement in the world economic catastrophe. We can’t tolerate anymore some individuals’ greedy aspirations ruining the lives of people around the world.
Back to top