Subscribe to The Spectator

Friday 10 February 2012

Latest issue

Buy the current issue

Jobs at Telegraph

Dear Mary

29 November 2008

Your problems solved

Q. The art and engineering expertise of the modern corsetière has brought great
happiness to men of a more traditional, and red-blooded, disposition. To what extent should one be permitted to address admiring glances at a well-presented embonpoint: in other words, at what stage does healthily lustful and artistic appreciation become a leer? And does the rule change according to the age of the owner of the chest concerned?
R.A.P., St Saviour, Guernsey

A. It is incorrect to leer directly at an embonpoint of any vintage — even when
blatantly display-mounted on the chest of its owner. You should admire it silently from a distance or in a mirror. If you must compliment someone on their looks, you should always compliment on their general appearance. It is risky to highlight specific
features — hair, face, slimness etc. — as the insecure then wonder what you think about the areas you failed to mention. Moreover it is always dehumanising to single out any one section of the body for praise. By so doing you reduce that section to the status of a butcher’s cut.

Q. Having recently been summoned (via group email) to the RSA for a talk and reception introducing a new TV series, I now find myself in a social dilemma: the party was fun, I saw some old friends, and now subsequently want to ask one or two of them to a party at my house. Trouble is I haven’t necessarily got their full addresses or phone numbers. As I am too mean to use Directory Enquiries, the easy option would be for me to get in touch with them via email. Is it acceptable in the age of electronic mail to tap into this cc list of addresses and help myself to their contact details? My question is this: should one be given someone’s contact details by the person themselves, or is it OK to ‘steal’ them from a group email list?
N.G., Oxford

More articles from: Mary Killen | this section

Post this entry to:   del.icio.us | Digg | Newsvine | NowPublic | Reddit

Comments Post comment

Fiona

January 10th, 2009 6:36am Report this comment

Dear Mary,
SS makes an most ethnic point of view. When one becomes a Doctor and takes an oath of allegiance to one's profession, one is always a Doctor as the professional service extends 24/7 every week of the year.

Post comment

Back to top

Cartoons

In this section

High life

Taki

Gstaad OK, sports fans! The Davos irrelevance is over, Gstaad…

Low life

Jeremy Clarke

Exeter airport. Check in. I’m booked on a domestic flight…

Real life

Melissa Kite

The Volvo only went in to have a parking light…

Wild life

Aidan Hartley

Wau, South Sudan ‘Let’s visit the brewery,’ said Ken when…

High life

Taki

Edmund Wilson was America’s premier man of letters (The Wound…

sponsored links

Spectator recommends

Spectator classifieds

THE PRESENT FINDER

1,700 Unusual Christmas Presents Request Catalogue 01935 815 195 Quote SPEC10 for 10% discount www.presentfinder.co.uk

OLIVE BRANCH FLORISTS

Pimilco based Florist with online ordering Web: www.olivebranch.net Tel: 020 7630 1868 Fax: 020 7233 8844

RUFFS Bespoke Signet rings

62 Shore Road, Warsash, Southampton, SO31 9FT Telephone: 01489 578867 Web site: www.ruffs.co.uk