Dear Mary

25 April 2009

Your problems solved

Q. Further to your letter last week about people crashing their seats back on long-distance flights, I long ago developed a technique for dealing with this problem. You pre-empt it by being prepared. As soon as the person in front starts gyrating, as a prelude to reclining fully, press your knees rigidly against the back of their seat. Because of restricted leg room in ‘goat class’, this is only too easy to do. The seat backs are invariably well-cushioned and they will not feel your knees. Instead they will assume that a faulty mechanism is at play and will very soon give up trying. It is unlikely they will bother to ask the stewardess to help them out, as she will have already made it clear that any extra service these days may be chargeable. I travel to the Middle East and back at least once a year and like to continue sitting upright during the flights so that I can read. This method has always worked for me.

Name and address withheld

A. Thank you for giving readers this tip.

Q. Sorry to be a bore, Mary, but I am confused. Can you rule once and for all on the words ‘toilet’ and ‘pardon’? Are they now acceptable?

M.D., London SW12

A. The word ‘toilet’ is now totally acceptable. It had to become so, partly because of the difficulty of making oneself understood in cinemas and other public places, but mainly because schoolchildren are given no other option but to use it. The word ‘pardon’ is not. It can still only be used as part of the sentence, ‘I beg your pardon.’

If you have a problem write to Dear Mary, c/o The Spectator, 22 Old Queen Street, London SW1H 9HP.