High Life

Wednesday, 20th May 2009

Celebrity worship

New York

This being my last week in the Bagel, the butterflies have arrived with a vengeance. Stuttgart, I am told, will be no picnic. Two top judokas, one Japanese, the other German, are in my age group, which I find quite ironic. My boat is named Bushido — the way of the Samurai warrior — and my admiration for the Wehrmacht’s fighting qualities and spirit is no secret. The greatest fighting unit ever — and I include the Spartans, and the US Marines — was Rommel’s 25th Panzer Regiment of the 7th Panzer Division. I only hope the father of the German I will meet in Stuttgart was not a member. If he was, goodbye title.

I can’t remember having spent a more pleasant two months than these past two. New York has been marvellous, the weather good, the training just about perfect, the boozing satisfactory. Lunching with my friend Dominic Dunne, the writer, and Chris Meigher, the publisher, I was informed by DD, who not only covered the trial, but knows more about this vile person’s background than anyone else, that Phil Spector ain’t doing too well in the pokey. It seems that Spector asked the warders to allow him to keep his wig while he’s awaiting his appeal to come through. (He owns about 30 of them, and changed them throughout his trial.) The jailers said no, and for obvious reasons. A wig is a perfect place to hide drugs, something Spector is synonymous with. He then appealed for permission to wear a hat, and was again turned down. That’s when he suddenly discovered religion. He demanded to have the largest yarmulka ever delivered to him, and this time the powers-that-be gave in. So the murderer of an innocent woman, whose only crime was to resist him, now walks around wearing a yarmulka ‘as big as a sombrero’, which goes to show that rediscovering one’s Jewishness has its advantages. I hope he rots in the place he’s in because this bum really deserves it. He’s been pulling guns on people all his life, slapping and beating up women, and had gotten away with it because of his ghastly music celebrity. He won’t be beating any gels around for the time being.

1 | 2 | 3 Next page

David Watkins

May 21st, 2009 12:45pm Report this comment

>The greatest fighting unit ever — and I include the Spartans, and the US Marines — was Rommel’s 25th Panzer Regiment of the 7th Panzer Division.

How can anybody make such a claim, when the history of warfare goes back over four milennia? What about the Boers commanded by De Wett, the Confederates commanded by Bedford, the Scots commanded by Wallace, numerous Saracen forces in the century after the birth of Islam, etc etc. Especially how can you? Have you devoted your life to the study of military history? Obviously not - you've been far to busy partying, engaging in obscure sports and managing your family's money. (Moreover you've never been a fighting soldier - at most you've beem a war tourist, like your hero Hemingway). So stop making a fool of yourself, please!

Richard Gill

May 22nd, 2009 12:45pm Report this comment

All I ask of w*nk*ers is that they do it in private; and of regulatory bodies that they make sure this happens, or else...

GK

May 26th, 2009 6:43pm Report this comment

I don't know about the US marines
but the rest mentioned by the columnist were pretty good fighting soldiers who fought against desperately overwhelming
circumstances, inflicting big casualties to the enemy, under obliterating american bombing(Normandy). The Scotts under Wallace looked more like wilds than soldiers and the Saracens were checked by the Byzantines, like the emperor Nicephoros II Phocas the White Death of Saracens, for far too long.

Post comment