Status anxiety

Once I was a restaurant critic. Now I must book like an ordinary person

24 November 2007

Toby Young works out his issues

I’m reminded of a funny article written by Ruth Reichl, the editor of Gourmet magazine. Back in 1993, when she was the chief restaurant critic of the New York Times, she decided to conduct a little experiment. She paid two visits to Le Cirque, first as herself and then as ‘Molly’, a middle-aged hausfrau in dark glasses and a wig. Needless to say, the experiences she had on each occasion were very different. Here was proof — if proof were needed — that how you’re treated in New York’s top restaurants is entirely dictated by how important you are perceived to be.

Since losing my column, I have become Ruth Reichl in a fright wig. Of course, I never imagined that the reason I was fawned upon in the country’s best restaurants was because the staff happened to like me — I’m not that naive — but I assumed that after plugging them relentlessly for five years I would have built up a certain amount of credit. Couldn’t they at least find a table for me in the back, just for old time’s sake? The answer is ‘Non.’ I’m now treated like any other punter — which is to say, with barely concealed contempt.

I’m finding it hard to adjust to this shift. This isn’t because I spent such a large amount of my time in the country’s top restaurants. Rather, it’s because the ability to ring up a fashionable eatery and get a table at a moment’s notice is such a reliable status indicator. It’s a perk that’s normally only enjoyed by the rich, the famous and the beautiful, like never having to queue to get into a nightclub. Consequently, to lose this privilege is a colossal blow. It’s as though I haven’t merely lost a column — I’ve also been exposed by the News of the World as a child molester.

I’m now beginning to think I would have been better off using a pseudonym when visiting restaurants in the past, like some of my colleagues. The rationale for this, obviously, is that they won’t be treated any differently from ordinary members of the public. The problem, though, is that the vast majority of top restaurant managers know exactly who the critics are and only pretend not to recognise them. Sometimes, they don’t even bother. There’s a famous story concerning A.A. Gill, for instance, who once appeared at a restaurant in dark glasses and told the maître d’ he had a table booked under the name of Cambridge. ‘Actually, you booked under the name of Oxford, Mr Gill,’ was the reply.

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ian skidmore

November 22nd, 2007 1:33pm Report this comment

acccept my sympathy. I too had a restaurant column and still haven't got over ringing a restaurant and getting a knock back. Fotunaely I live in a diferent pat of the country than I did then. The restaurants I used often framed my reviews in the window. To get a knock back from one of those would have been unbearable. I get a double whammy because I was a theatre critic as well

Once again

November 30th, 2007 7:36pm Report this comment

Perhaps AA Gill could be deflated - he too has fattened up on fine words and free fine foods. Readers know that food critics are professional emperors with no clothes. Newspapers needing to cost cut could start right there. If these clowns paid for their own meals and were totally unknown they would still be of no use to ordinary customers who pay exhorbitant prices and aren't able to get tables because of them. Good cooks attract good customers with the aid of the spoken word. Now, IF someone would critique the lavatories and cleanliness of staff and establishment.........! No takers? Thought not.

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