Dear Mary

6 June 2009

Your problems solved

Dear Mary writes: Warning. The next problem contains material which may revolt. Please skip it if you are of a sensitive disposition.

Q. I am faced with a very frustrating issue, and try as I may, seem totally unable to find a suitable solution. One of the two individuals with whom I share my residence, a man of much ability in the world of sports, is very apt to clean his nostrils by bare hand, in the most indiscreet way imaginable. He subsequently disposes his nasal debris on to the floor in the living room, seemingly unaware of what he is doing and that we can see what his fingers are up (to). Whereas I appreciate this puerile practice is not uncommon, it is hardly fair to engage in it in full view of other people, and seemingly as a means of relaxation. Please, Mary, suggest a course of action without my having to seem too crass.

Name and address withheld

A. A co-operative but innocent-seeming child must visit your house. When the outrage takes place he/she must ask the offender to explain why it is all right for him to do what he is doing when the child has been told it is very bad manners. Do not intervene as the man tries to explain his behaviour. Then offer to help him break the unconscious habit by shouting at him each time he does it. You should soon see an end to the nuisance.

Q. There is no mobile signal for the last 20 miles of my husband’s train journey. Therefore I often go too early to the station because he has been unable to tell me he will be late when there are the inevitable problems. What should I do, Mary?

I.S.W., Wiltshire

A. Why not subscribe to National Rail Live Departures and Arrivals? This programme can be downloaded to iPhones for a nugatory fee.