Tell Arabella what to do
A friend has pointed out that I might have been a tad unkind to Arabella Weir. As he puts it:
It is not entirely clear to me that she actually intends to go on hunger strike – the timeline is rather unclear. It appears that she will be attempting to do a number of things simultaneously, a few of which seem to defy the laws of physics.Indeed. Here's what she said:
I will go on hunger strike and throw myself in front of the next horse at Ascot if he wins. Failing that I was going to say I'll sleep with him, but he'd probably say yes. So instead I'll chain myself to the railings of his house. And then I'll move out of London.I think we need to help her make up her mind. She promised to do four things, so I've set up a poll for you to vote on which option she should pursue. Conveniently, there's a meeting at Ascot on Saturday, so I'll make Friday at 6pm the deadline to vote. That way, should the majority of you want her to throw herself under a horse, she'll have plenty of time to get to Ascot the next day. (I like to be helpful.)
 |
What should Arabella do? |
| Go on hunger strike | |
| Throw herself in front of a horse at Ascot | |
| Chain herself to the railings outside Boris' house | |
| Leave London | |
| magic pharmacy online | |
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Michael Walker
May 7th, 2008 3:49pmIt should be noted that her reference to Ascot is wrong. Epsom is where politically inspired throwings under horses traditionally occur...
Ben Disraeli
May 7th, 2008 5:27pmThrowing herself under a horse might damage the horse, so I voted for Go on a diet...uh, that is Go on a hunger strike.
The Fast Show was moderately funny though, so it's not a complete disaster.
Ron Combo
May 7th, 2008 9:24pmI think chaining herself to Boris's railings would be just perfect. As he leaves for work every morning he could suggest a likely runner in the 3.45 at Ascot/Epsom/wherever under which she could throw herself. Let's hope the horse doesn't come to grief.
Lee Jakeman
May 7th, 2008 11:16pmStephen - I think you need a "none of the above" option. My advice to her would have been: "Go home, dear, have a cup of tea, sit beside the fire and knit yourself a nice sweater" - or something similarly patronising.
Verity
May 8th, 2008 5:58pmPerhaps she could chain herself to Boris's bicycle.