A pin-up for Scottish pensioners

‘I’m a pin-up for Scottish pensioners’

Mary Wakefield

05 September 2007

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Clarissa Dickson Wright speaks her mind

Great story, I say, blushing. ‘Yes.’ (Clarissa is on a roll.) ‘I mentioned it in print a few weeks ago and now I’ve become a bit of a local sex symbol! I popped into the shop to buy a paper the other day and a man came up to me and pressed his phone number into my hand. I’m a pin-up for Scottish pensioners!’

It’s not just her own private life up for grabs. Clarissa’s time at the Bar overlapped with that of several prominent New Labourites, and she’ll discusses their escapades with equal gusto: ‘Cherie Blair was clever but desperately needy and always jumping on Derry Irvine.’ I wince. ‘Actually, Derry Irvine was quite a sexy guy back then,’ says Clarissa. ‘He radiated intelligence.’ And then there’s Tony Blair. ‘He was a few years younger than me but I remember him well. He was very glib, a chancer and, you know, he wasn’t really respected by anyone of my generation. Everybody used to say, it’s just as well he’s going into politics because he’ll never succeed at the Bar. We used to call him Miranda.’ Because he was wet? ‘No, no, he wasn’t called Miranda because he was wet, ducky!’ Clarissa guffaws impatiently. ‘Remember that scene in The Tempest when Miranda sees the sailors? Well then. He got on conspicuously well with all the male junior clerks. Everybody knew it.’ But he’s married now, I say. ‘So are a lot of people.’

A fan approaches at that moment, Clarissa turns away to sign her book and my mind races. Is she exaggerating? Clarissa admits to telling porkies at school, but I can’t believe she’d just make it up. I decide to appeal to Spectator readers who may have been Blair’s contemporaries at the Bar: was Tony Miranda?