ODD NIGHT OUT

Early days yet, of course, but if there's going to be a works outing, perhaps we could go and hear Stephen's least-favourite singer, Macy Gray, at Ronnie Scott's next month. (Don't worry, Mr P, I'm only joking. I can't stand her either. Give me Aretha any day.)  Or what about Cecilia Stalin, who's appearing at the Vortex in a week or so? She's not to be confused with the calypso singer, Black Stalin, or the Brazilian samba-rocker, Lenine (whose father, as he once explained to me, was a sentimental old Communist). Talking of dictatorial names, I did once get a chance to hear the jazz pianist Romano Mussolini, who really was the son of Il Duce. There's an oft-told story about the time that Mussolini Jr first met that footloose and terminally laid-back trumpeter Chet Baker. The ever-ingenuous Chet is supposed to have greeted him on the bandstand with "Gee, it's a drag about your old man."

Far-fetched? Yes, but no more so than the idea of Macy Gray playing Ronnie's.