World Wine-Scoring Federation smackdown

I have no intention of saying anything more about Bordeaux – except that I always know spring will soon turn into summer when the annual spat between the English wine trade and the American wine critic Robert Parker kicks off. (In a good year, the press join in as well). I have not been entirely successful in banishing from my mind the image of a bevy of St.James’s wine merchants dressed up as morris dancers visiting those awkward knee jerk actions to “Uncle Bob’s” ample posterior as part of a merry, flower-decked progress around a convenient maypole.

In reviewing the top clarets of the recently-released 2008 vintage, Parker has just put a bomb under the trade by (in their view) doling out far too many big scores in his 100-point marking system. Just when they’d persuaded most of the chateaux owners to cut their prices drastically.

Everybody (and their dog) has a marking system these days though and the part I like best is when the two camps start marking wines “tactically” (“childishly” is an alternative description). A couple of years ago Parker gave St Emilion's Château Quinault L'Enclos 2005 an “outstanding” mark of 92-4 points and described it as “gorgeously textured, medium-bodied, and elegant yet intensely flavored with a power and texture that build on the palate. Anticipated maturity: 2010-2030.” This prompted the owner to up his price by 85% on the preceding year.

A London merchant countered that the wine was “not as fat and extracted as recent years but still very New World in style. Moderate length, should provide, soft, easy early drinking. Drink 2008-2012" and gave it a mark of 13.5 out of 20 (a score which you might charitably give to a super-market own brand, non-vintage Chilean weasel water). Bring it on, boys!