M&S' problem is clear

Anthony

At least we aren't being treated to the whole "This isn't just mechanically re-constituted chicken, this is M&S mechanically re-constituted chicken..." stuff as much. That had me nearly putting a table lamp through the TV screen.

It reached its peak when I was shopping in the Oxford branch of M&S just before Christmas. They'd set up a screen in the food section that was playing the entire selection of M&S food adverts on a loop. So while trying to purchase stuff you were forced to listen to the same few bars of "Albatross" over and over and over again while listening to someone going "This isn't just [product], this is M&S [product]" endlessly.

Luckily, after about ten minutes that sound of my teeth grinding served to block much of it out.

Adam B.

We're meant to be impressed with Mylene Klass because she's good looking and has a (mediocre at best) classical music background. A triumphant product of our dumbed down era. What has she actually done? She must have a great agent!

John

I agree. It is a tough contest: which is more irritating, Klass or the Halifax wailer. And yes, those TV ads lost M&S my business for years. I won't touch either company now.
But there is more to it than that. M&S has no idea how to meet customers' needs. About 4 years ago I went into the Oxford Street 'flagship' branch. They had not one single tube or tin of brown shoe-polish. They had plenty of black polish. They also had whole rows of men's brown shoes. Another thing they didn't have was a single member of staff to complain to, not even at the 'customer service' desk (and this was at 5.00 pm!). Finally I found someone on another floor, who reluctantly called the deputy manager, who trotted out something along the lines of 'company policy'. When I phoned head office, they fobbed me off with more of the same: 'Our customers don't want brown shoe-polish, Sir' (the last with an impatient sneer as to an annoying toddler), so we don't stock it'.
Prats.

Christopher

Nice baps though

cat osb

Hey, lighten up! But perhaps you'd prefer to be surrounded by real women in your local Asda, Somerfield or Iceland; that way you can admire their prize, fast-food raised, inked and studded frames tastefully attired in the latest sportswear, whilst you wait alongside them and their shaven-headed, semi-feral spawn in the checkout queue. Call me dumbed down, but I'll settle for pictures of Klass.

Ian C

I'll go with 'cat osb'.

Irritating as I find my twice annual visits to M&S for socks, pants and chinos (they have my size about every fourth visit, I don't why I bother to try so regularly) the alternative image painted by 'cat osb' is so evocative of my even rarer visits to Asda.

cat osb

Hey John, we don't have that problem here in Reading, we have all sorts of Polish behind the counters. And very charming they are too.

Chris

Stephen - how could you fail to be charmed by Myleen?

You're talking about the woman I love.

Seriously - I do not tire of looking at the lovely Myleen. She is near perfection.

(I put this down, at least in part to my burgeoning mid life crisis)

Nigel Cohen

She's hot, what's the issue Stephen?

Paul

There's not much wrong with pictures of Mylene Klass in a bikini. If she were an anonymous model, I doubt you'd have written this post. The thing about her being a bit of a joke as a classical musician is entirely irrelevant to M&S using her to brighten their stores up a bit. And yes, while she may be just another celeb - she is actually reasonably bright and quite a sweetheart.

In short: there are many more worthy targets of your ire than this generally agreeable young woman.

jr

I always thought she showed a great deal of humility by "settling" for a commercial modeling career. I imagine that most pop-stars of the moment would see it as too much of a step down.

In fact, I seem to remember when she first started she insisted that she wasn't the star of the show.

I didn't know she attempted a classical career, and I won't think any less of here because it failed.

Commondog

I find all this talk of Mylene Klass just too much to take.
If there's much more of it I'll drive to the nearest high bridge, stop the car, get out and toss myself over the edge.

John

"get out and toss myself over the edge"

Would you care to rephrase that?

John

LOL, cat osb.

When I really gave up bothering with M&S is when I popped into my nearest branch on a Friday to buy a simple pair of shoes. They had them in every size but mine (I am a very average size, at least in that department!). Why not? "It's controlled by central ordering". In other words, local customers' needs are irrelevant, it's all in the hands of the Central Tractor Production Kommissariat.
They told me to try on Monday, they may come in. Well, I wasn't going to travel 20 miles on the off chance. If I wanted to live under Communist planning and shortages, I would have emigrated to East Germany.
Oh, yes: they also didn't have any y-fronts. I mean, they didn't have ANY y-fronts. Not just in my favourite colour or XX large ;-)
- none at all.

Commondog

John.

Nope. I am what I am.

Kevyn Bodman

I don't know who Mylene Klass is but I can recognise an unpleasant post when I see one.
I assume, and it's a reasonable assumption since you are on a conservative site, that you support the free market and its choice.
You are exercising that by not going into an M&S for months. Fair enough.
But why are your writings so negative?Indeed spiteful about Miss Klass here.

What do you enjoy in life, Mr.Pollard?
I remember your reaction to the Champions' League final; you were less hapy at Manchester United's victory than that John Terry slipped at the crucial moment.Robust opinions and comments do not need to be bilious.
Think on it.

I exercise my market choice by shopping in M&S a lot.

And by reading Melanie for robustness without bile.

J. Isaacs

Agree with Stephen about the Richard Clayderman arpegios, but also agree with Christopher about nice baps and Nigel Cohen. I am a reasonable Mylene fan in one or two of her spheres of influence, but certainly not enough to toss myself off the nearest M&S escalator shaft like a Commondog.

Alexandrovich

Commondog, you'll have to be a tad less subtle with this lot.
They can't be familiar with Mr. Miller.

Jennie

M&S for long had a reputation as one of the best retailers in the middle market. Now it's gone down market, in a desperate attempt to pick up a few sales, with a vengeance.

Their homeware department now includes downmarket products that would disgrace Woolworths.

John

Nobody is forcing Kevyn to come here, and robust opinions can be posted without his pomposity.