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Friday 18 July 2008

Shared Opinion

If Scotland is to be independent, then why not London? And good luck to what’s left

Here is a fun game for you. In only four words, try to sum up why anybody north of the border might fancy independence. Have a think. Something to rival the neat ‘No Taxation Without Representation’ quip of the American colonialists of the 18th century. Tricky, eh?

And yet, with other famous independence movements, it’s a doddle. After the Boer war, ‘We Are Basically Dutch’ could have done it in South Africa. Gandhi was a bit too loquacious to have managed four words in British India, but ‘You’re Stealing From Us’ would have worked. For the Irish, there were loads of options: ‘We Voted For It’, or maybe, ‘Ahem, There’s a Sea’.

Even now, the Basques could have ‘We Don’t Speak Spanish’, the Tibetans ‘You Killed Our Monks’ and the Chechens ‘It Makes Crime Easier’. But the Scots? I’ve been wracking my brain, and I’m close to stumped. ‘It’s Scotland’s Oil’ would have been a contender once, but it seems a bit short-sighted these days. ‘They’re Scotland’s Prospective Wind Farms’ just doesn’t have the same kick. And anyway, it’s a word too long. Quite honestly, try as I might, I reckon I can only think of two. They are ‘Why the Hell Not?’ and ‘We’re a Bit Bored’.

Do many Scots really fancy independence? God knows. I suspect, however, not. Polling is a bit of a mess in Scotland, but when the question is asked straight out, about one in three seems keen. Throw in phrases like ‘end the Union’ or ‘leave Britain’ and support plummets. And yet, a cult of grinding inevitability has somehow emerged. Whether it is five years or 50 years, Scottish independence has started to feel like a ‘when’, not an ‘if’.

Why? What is in it for anybody? You stop and step back and think about it, and you have to wonder. Under the last Tory government there was a gripe, and that gripe was under-representation. By the time John Major left office, there were barely enough Tory MPs to staff the Scottish Office. Popular opinion had begun to regard them almost as imperial governors, like Pontius Pilate in Jerusalem. But these days, Scots are better represented than anybody else in the Union, up to and including Londoners.

More articles from: Hugo Rifkind | this section

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