Your problems solved
Your problems solved
Once again Mary has invited some of her favourite Persons of Distinction to submit queries for her Christmas consideration.
A. I understand some Euro MPs have discussed using the informal American right hand flipped up (the Native American ‘How!’), obviously falling short of its Hitlerian rigidity, but this will not wash. Today’s constant television presence means that whenever leaders are seen meeting in a public place they must pretend to be very, very effusive. When the number one American does not favour the American salute when meeting Palestinians and Israelis, but goes in for hugging them instead, there is no room for a new etiquette of avoidance for others. Yet for the health-conscious, hugging is, paradoxically, an excellent technique. You can simulate enthusiasm while, in reality, handling only the clothing of the huggee rather than the flesh.
From Selina Blow, London SW1
Q. I wondered if you could help me with the following concern. One of our past customers has purchased a midnight-blue bouclé ‘Barbarella coat’, a very striking piece, with funnel collar, a mix between Jane Fonda in Barbarella and Audrey Hepburn in Sabrina. In payment she split it between three various financial sources (housekeeping account/gardening account/Girl Guide contributions), which she traditionally does. Furthermore she has clearly asked the sales staff, if her husband came in, not to say she had been in. However, her husband came to see the menswear and was very insistent to know if his wife had been in or not and became quite aggressive. Could you help me on this delicate matter?
A. Train your staff to respond to such sensitive inquiries by droning the perfectly plausible mantra, ‘I’m sorry, sir. I am unable to tell you either way for reasons of data protection.’
From the Countess of Cranbrook OBE, Suffolk
Q. May I pass on a tip to readers? Many people have problems with clothes moths today. There seems to be a particularly virulent variety in circulation. Perhaps it is related to warmer winters. Anything woollen is now their prey — even things which were never touched before. Our solution is a deep freeze in my husband’s dressing room. Precious woollen clothes visit the freezer in rotation and the moths, their larvae and their eggs are all killed after a ten-day mini ice age. They thaw out in minutes and can then be worn or safely put away in moth-proof containers. Clothes in regular use live in cupboards and drawers but return to the freezer from time to time for another killing session. They survive but the moths don’t.
A. How very kind of you to submit this tip in response to my invitation.
From Molly Dineen, London W14
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gerry
December 14th, 2007 11:10amMay I offer another tip about moths in clothes? There is a small bushy plant termed "Southernwood", which was used as a deterrent before mothballs. It is hardy and has a pleasant smell.