Notting Hill Nobody
Notting Hill Nobody
Tamzin Lightwater's unique take on the week
Monday
What can I say?! Happiness and General Wellbeing levels through roof! Dave is the greatest! We’re definitely going to win in 2009!! But more importantly, I have been seconded on to the Brown Attack Unit!
Am at centre of fevered preparations ahead of PMQs involving cut-throat political strategy. So far have come up with Great Clunking Cowardy Custard and Big Fat Miserable Loser. For some reason, neither of these seem to have made it on to Jed’s shortlist of insults to be hurled across dispatch box by Dave, but there’s time yet. Have never seen Gids so happy. He’s commissioned limited-edition flock wallpaper with the words ‘I Told You Gordon Was Crap!’ in fancy lettering. So glad it came right for him in the end. To think we all had to brief that rubbish about being frightened!
DD not convinced, of course. Lots of safari metaphors about not poking a wounded lion until you’re sure he’s dead. He can be such a party pooper.
Heaps of nice letters from candidates. All of them retracting their requests for Dave not to visit them during an election campaign. So moving.
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Manuel Escott
October 15th, 2007 11:11pmAm desperately in love with Tamzin. Have tried to in vain to contact her by email with a view to setting up a fan club here in Toronto, Sadly I now have to conclude that Tamzin Lightwater is in fact some wit at the Spectator or a freelancer. But please, for God's sake, do not tell me Tamzin is really Boris or Rachel Johnson.