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Diary of a Notting Hill nobody

Tamzin Lightwater

Wednesday, 20th August 2008

Tamzin Lightwater's unique take on the week

Monday

Hooray! It’s official — Dave is no longer the Heir to Blair, he’s the Heir to Thatcher!! This makes all our hard rebranding work worthwhile. As Nigel says, it’s a measure of how far we have come that we are now able to wage war on benefit cheats, binge drinkers and Russia. None of us would have thought this possible a year ago.

When you think of the ground we have covered, relentlessly forging ahead with different strategies at every available opportunity, it really does seem incredible.

For those of you who may need reminding: We are now the party of: the environment; the NHS; the North; the arts; traditional values; Change; Equality; lower taxes (business); higher taxes (to be confirmed); Liberty; Law and Order; and, last but not least, Fairness.

‘But how has this all been achieved?’ I hear you ask. Well, let me tell you: it has not been easy. By no means. And there have been times when it has, frankly, involved Yours Truly running around like a headless chicken. But I think I speak for everyone here at HQ when I say we couldn’t have done it if we didn’t Believe.

Tuesday

V amusing round of Fantasy Tory with Poppy. It threw up an interesting ethical question — if Geri Halliwell, Madonna and Liam Gallagher are all Conservatives, then which one should we chose to introduce Dave at the 2010 victory rally? Tough one, eh?

Geri could sing ‘Congratulations, Mr Prime Minister’ in the manner of Marilyn Monroe. Then again, Madonna could do something really eye-catching with the tree logo. But of course it’s too early to think about these things. I’ve seen the Forward Strategy Grid and our first victory rally planning meeting isn’t until next March.

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Dwight Vandryver

August 27th, 2008 1:22am

Absolutely. Don't do as I do, do as I say. One feels sure that this column will remark on Boris' observations about the game of ping-pong, made after the closing ceremony in Beijing. It did seem as if Mr. Johnson had also been suffering from an allergy to chillies.

A child of our time

From the economic and psychological bedlam of the global downturn has emerged a particularly dangerous false dichotomy: namely, that there is somehow a choice for ministers over the next few years between economic reconstruction and the repair of Britain’s broken society, and that the government (whether Labour or Conservative) must prioritise the former at the expense of the latter.

Diary

Anne Robinson

The daughter and I spent the last few days before the American election in Arizona.

Politics

Fraser Nelson

Fraser Nelson reviews the week in politics

The Spectator's Notes

Charles Moore

‘A money-financed tax cut is essentially equivalent to Milton Friedman’s famous “helicopter drop” of money.’ So said Ben Bernanke, now the chairman of the Fed, in a speech about how to ward off the ‘extremely small’ chance of deflation, which he delivered in 2002.