Rod Liddle Rod Liddle

Have we ever faced an enemy more stupid than Muslim terrorists?

These narcissistic adolescent halfwits should not fill us with fear, says Rod Liddle. The aircraft plot trial showed yet again that those who wish to murder us with fizzy pop and peroxide are a bunch of cowards

Isn’t it about time Muslim terrorists rethought their strategy of recording glorious martyrdom videos, in advance of failing to blow anything up? Wouldn’t it be a bit less embarrassing for all concerned? Time after time we see these imbeciles on our television news promising all sorts of mayhem and misery, the righteous and cleansing fires of Allah poured down upon we imperialist decadent kafir scum, ‘body parts’ scattered in the streets, etc. And then they forget to take a cigarette lighter with them to the airport, or the detonator doesn’t work, or they’re arrested buying 5,000 bottles of hydrogen peroxide from the local hairdresser’s shop and thus somehow arousing suspicion (just how blond do you want to be, Mohammed?). Or they can’t find a place to park, or they can’t light the fuse in their shoe, or they suddenly get the heeby-jeebies on a bus and run away.

Have we ever, as a nation, faced an enemy more cowardly or more intellectually challenged? At least the IRA had a soupçon of strategic vision and had the good taste and sense not to brag about their atrocities in advance, on film — they just bragged about them afterwards, with the vague intimation of an apology. Also, they knew how to work explosives, how to make them go bang and kill innocent people — so credit where it’s due. And for all their forlorn hopelessness, it was at least touch and go with the poor Argies for a while, up on Goose Green. But this lot, our current tormentors, the people charged with the task of dragging us to the abyss? If the whacko evangelical Christians and Muslims are correct and there really will be a final bloody conflagration at a place called Armageddon — well, hell, at least it will be brief, with not too many injured on our side.

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