Low life

Sparks flying

12 September 2007 6:06 pm

She lay on her side and watched the people coming and going from the tented stalls and music stages.

Worshipping seaweed

5 September 2007 1:43 pm

Low life

Happy families

29 August 2007 3:07 pm

My boy’s mother and Adolf Hitler share the same birthday...

Collective scepticism

22 August 2007 3:00 pm

The theatre was a converted Anglican church. Was there perhaps a lingering, antagonistic Christian spirit at work here tonight?

Great expectations

15 August 2007 3:50 pm

Three hours to go before the new season kicks off and I’m sitting in the beer garden in my new claret-and-blue Fred Perry polo shirt.

Homicidal urges

1 August 2007 4:11 pm

During the wettest July since records began, I was completely dry. As usual, not drinking made me angry and withdrawn.

Eye trouble

25 July 2007 3:15 pm

My boy’s mother’s husband was plastering a wall last week when a sack of lime fell off the scaffold and landed on his dog...

A dog’s life

18 July 2007 3:06 pm

One of the main drawbacks to living on the south Devon coast is the number of drivers on the road who are over 80. I’m not saying they shouldn’t be there.

Firm friends

11 July 2007 3:09 pm

The moment the announcer stated that the 9.05 to Newquay was leaving from platform four, virtually the entire crowd on the concourse at Paddington station arose like a Zulu impi and ran towards it.

Local heroes

21 June 2007 2:19 pm

When I was six or seven I went up to London with my father in his car

Enchanted wood

13 June 2007 11:15 pm

My sister was round at our house at the weekend, trying to give up cannabis after 35 years

Returning penitents

12 April 2007 8:24 am

I’m back in the gym. I put it down to the lighter evenings and the rising sap

Lonely planets

4 April 2007 1:48 pm

We love this old house and can’t imagine living anywhere else. But needs must and we’ve finally bitten the bullet — the house is on the market from today.

Fizzing with happiness

28 March 2007 2:02 pm

Since my boy passed his driving test, just one month after his 17th birthday, I no longer drive the ten miles to his mother’s house to pick him up at weekends.

Rogues and funsters

21 March 2007 4:21 pm

At Cheltenham this year I was once again a guest of racing tipster and bon viveur Colonel Pinstripe.

What a laugh

15 March 2007 9:19 am

But when the Renault Mégane drew up, the boredom and discomfort of the interminable train journey was instantly forgotten

The fascination of the horrible

8 March 2007 8:06 am

Supporting West Ham this season has been so full of drama and surprise, it’s been like living in the Book of Revelation

Inner conflict

22 February 2007 9:41 am

During the last week of my stay in the Alpujarras, the almond trees flowered

Matrimonial relations

8 February 2007 7:56 am

There’s a man in one of the high mountain villages who lives with a cow and spends much of his time studying the cloud formations

Spanish epiphany

25 January 2007 9:45 am

All the witches around here specialise

Grace and favour

17 January 2007 7:30 pm

British airports must be a shattering experience if you have dignity

Perfect manners

10 January 2007 5:13 pm

A sure sign that the mental ebb tide is in full flood is when you can’t remember your own name

Low life

13 December 2006 2:09 pm

A social leper tells you of his miserable existence

Out of this world

23 November 2006 8:52 am

After chucking-out time a few of us went round to Trev’s to smoke crack through a water-pipe

Family secrets

25 October 2006 6:13 pm

A social leper tells you of his miserable existence