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Self harm

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19 January 2019

9:00 AM

19 January 2019

9:00 AM

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‘Oh no! We’ve woken up too early and haven’t missed Brexit!’

Tortoises

‘On a clear day you can see five county lines drugs rackets.’

Drugs

‘A bit late for that — they’ve already appointed Nick Clegg.’

Self harm

‘I can’t eat that — I’m black-toast intolerant.’

Toast

Ballot

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Cartoons

‘Least said, texted, tweeted, retweeted, Instagrammed, posted, uploaded, shared, blogged, vlogged and Snapchatted, soonest mended.’
‘Least said, texted, tweeted, retweeted, Instagrammed, posted, uploaded, shared, blogged, vlogged and Snapchatted, soonest mended.’
‘At least Chris Grayling isn’t in charge of the ferry.’
‘At least Chris Grayling isn’t in charge of the ferry.’
‘Before you say it, no — you can’t hand in a marriage licence.’
‘Before you say it, no — you can’t hand in a marriage licence.’
‘Oh no! We’ve woken up too early and haven’t missed Brexit!’
‘Oh no! We’ve woken up too early and haven’t missed Brexit!’
‘Brexit? I’m stockpiling for a new statue of Thatcher.’
‘Brexit? I’m stockpiling for a new statue of Thatcher.’
‘A woman aged 55 could have painted it.’
‘A woman aged 55 could have painted it.’
‘A bit late for that — they’ve already appointed Nick Clegg.’
‘A bit late for that — they’ve already appointed Nick Clegg.’
‘On a clear day you can see five county lines drugs rackets.’
‘On a clear day you can see five county lines drugs rackets.’
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