Q. I have organised a city break to Florence with a particularly easygoing bunch of friends. We have one spare room in the flat that we have hired and a friend of a friend has come forward to suggest himself. Everyone else going is very unqueeny and unfussy but I suspect this man may be a bit of a bore of the sort who complains that wine is corked or that queues are too long.
How can I find out before it is too late and he is already on board and spoiling the fun for the rest of us with his quibbling ways? On the other hand, he is very intelligent and interesting and I may have got him quite wrong.
–A.B., London W8
A. Invite the man to your house and offer him a gin and tonic. Use a pre-opened tonic that you have prepared earlier to make sure it is slightly, though not completely, flat.
If he complains and asks you to start again with a fresh mixture, you will know that he is not the right person to accompany you on this easygoing cultural trip.
Q. My kind aunt invited us to stay for a week in the sun. Everything was first rate but we felt let down by a local fishing teacher whom she hired through an agency. He was to take out my young son and his friend but he failed to give them a lesson — instead, he just fished himself and told the boys to watch him. They did not like to disappoint my aunt so the boys pretended they had had a great day. We checked the cost of the lesson online and it was an outrageous amount. What should we do?
—Name and address withheld
A. Bypass your aunt and register your complaints with the agency who supplied the fishing teacher in the first place. They should understand and respect your desire to keep the disappointing news from the payer, but in this way you can ensure that justice will be done.
Q. Friends of friends have a son who put on a play at Edinburgh. I stupidly told them I would be in Edinburgh and would make sure I saw the production. The son saw me in the audience — which was tiny — so I could not leave without him noticing, but the hour-long event was absolute rubbish from start to finish with no redeeming features. It even cost a fortune. What should I say when these very beady parents ring me for feedback?
—Name and address withheld
A. Tell them that, just as you sat down, you had a text from home saying that your cat/dog/budgie/hedgehog was missing. You then went through agonies for an hour until you could turn the phone on again, only to find the animal had turned up. The tragedy of this was that you were unable to concentrate properly on the performance, which you are quite sure was wonderful.
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