Why, Woody, why? A Rainy Day in New York reviewed

A Rainy Day in New York is Woody Allen’s 49th film and it’s not been without its troubles. When accusations of sexual abuse made by his adopted daughter, Dylan Farrow, resurfaced, Amazon Studios ditched it. Then its star, Timothée Chalamet, apologised for being in it and donated his earnings to charity. We may never know the truth about the allegations and I wouldn’t wish to speculate as I’m a coward at heart and don’t want to end up on the wrong side of history. I can only put it like this: whereas I once idolised Allen — ‘Don’t worry. We can walk to the kerb!’ is something I still say when someone parks badly — the decisions he’s now making are definitely landing on the wrong side of creepy. Why include a story about an older man lusting after a young college girl in a tiny skirt; why? You’re a smart fella. Just make up something else!

The film opens with our young people. Chalamet is Gatsby Welles, a college student who is brilliant and wealthy but also directionless and hates his rich family. He attends leafy, fictional Yardley College and is dating a fellow student. This is Ashleigh (Elle Fanning), whom Gatsby adores because, presumably, he has a thing for underwritten women who are still childlike. She’s 21, not nine!, I kept wanting to scream. But Ashleigh is unworldly and seems to exist solely on Planet Wonder and basically goes around exclaiming: ‘OMG, OMG, OMG!’ Meanwhile, Gatsby wears tweed, whereas Ashleigh does not. Instead, she wears super-tight, fluffy sweaters teamed with postage-stamp mini-skirts. If Allen had applied the rule that whatever a woman has to wear in a film the men must wear the equivalent, then all the men in Rainy Day would be going about in their pants. And not even roomy ones.