The hallmark of this ridiculous government is the difficulty one always has on 1 April trying to discern which newspaper stories are April Fools. The Guardian tickles our ribs in suggesting that Carla Bruni is being recruited in Brown's Government Of All the Talents as some kind of fashion tsar. Is that so much more incredible than the real-life attempt to recruit Fiona Phillips, the GMTV presenter, and offer her a peerage and place in the Department of Health? We had a story last week saying that only 34% people believe official statistics, according to official statistics. This is the only tool one has to spot the real stories. They go beyond the imagination of even the most contemptuous comedian. As Littlejohn says, you couldn’t make it up.