Bone idols

New York

The Manhattan tattoo artist Craig Dershowitz had already spent $60,000 fighting a desperate legal battle with his ex-girlfriend for custody of their ‘son’ before he appealed to the public a few weeks ago. He needed another $20,000 so he can keep going, he said. Had the helpless victim at the centre of this tug-of-love been a real boy, Mr Dershowitz could have kissed his campaign goodbye. But Dershowitz junior is actually a puppy, Knuckles, part pug, part beagle, all ‘puggle’ — so Craig’s in with a chance of getting the cash. A $25 donation will get you a Save Knux T-shirt, $10 will buy you a ‘virtual smooch’ with the puggle.

But Knuckles is not alone. His is just one crazy tale in a city that has become crazily obsessed with its dogs. We British may pride ourselves on being a nation of canophiles, but New Yorkers are in a league of their own. 

What’s behind it all? Well, like Mr Dershowitz, more and more dog owners are single or childless and see their pets as surrogate children — to be in turns spoilt rotten, obsessed over and neglected.

Not for nothing does the US pet industry nowadays insist on talking about pet ‘parents’ rather than ‘owners’. Swallow that distinction and the assault on your wallet — and intelligence — comes relatively easily. After all, once a dog becomes a child, what parents could resist spoiling it with some of the lovely treats on offer: luxury dog spas, dog dating agencies, dog acupuncture? You can even buy your pooch a blueberry facial. 

And what if your pride and joy falls for a piece of tail in Central Park? What parent would begrudge him or her a nice dog wedding? There was one at an expensive Greenwich Village restaurant last month at which Boo the Pomeranian and Piper the Chihuahua ‘exchanged collars’.