Buttercup the cow was so convincing I felt quite moved: Jack and the Beanstalk reviewed

This pantomime was filmed by ‘legendary Blue Peter presenter’ Peter Duncan in his back garden over the summer. It was intended for online release only but it’s also gone into cinemas because this is the world we now live in. Oh no it isn’t. Oh yes it is. Oh no it isn’t. Seriously, it is. Why are you arguing like this? Stop it.

As many theatres are still closed, and as most pantomimes have been cancelled, it makes sense to show it in cinemas and for cinemas to have something to show. During normal times the Christmas period is The Favourite and Portrait of a Lady and, while we’re at it, have David Copperfield and Little Women too. But film companies are waiting for audiences to return in greater numbers, and as the Oscars have been postponed (from February to April) the usual race to qualify (by 31 December) isn’t on. So it’s a filmed back-garden panto. But is filmed back-garden panto better than no panto at all? You bet. It’s camp. It’s silly. It’s exuberant. It’s cheering. And I say that as someone who, as a rule, isn’t especially taken with this particular British tradition. (The last panto I saw, at Wrexham town hall, had everyone doubled up with laughter but I just fell asleep. Thankfully.)

As already noted, this was all put together by the ‘legendary Blue Peter presenter’ who I initially thought was the one that did drugs, but that was another one. This is the one who didn’t do drugs but, pre-Blue Peter, did once appear nude in a porn film, although I don’t think it is necessary to dwell on that. (It’s behind him!)

The first thing you’ll note is that being a ‘legendary Blue Peter presenter’ certainly pays because his house — in Wandsworth, I think — is an enormous double-fronted villa while his garden is both massive and distractingly luscious.