David Cameron’s larynx joins the Labour party

David Cameron's larynx joins the Labour party
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Given that Owen Jones, Glenda Jackson and Derek Hatton are just a handful of the figures to recently turn on Jeremy Corbyn, one could be forgiven for thinking that the Labour leader is turning people off Labour. So, Mr S was surprised to learn of Labour's latest recruit, in today's issue of the Times.

Step forward Clare Foges. Yes, David Cameron's former SpAd and speechwriter -- who earned the affectionate nickname ‘the Prime Minister’s Larynx’ -- has joined... the Labour party. Writing in the Times, Foges says that she is as surprised as anyone by her decision:

'I tapped out the words somewhat guiltily, late at night. This was entering a corner of the internet I had never before probed, somewhere I never imagined I would go; a place of strange, even perverted ideas. “How to join the Labour Party?”

I had not been to Venezuela and realised that we should emulate their economic policies, nor read the collected speeches of Diane Abbott and had a Damascene conversion.'

In truth, Foges has no plans to vote Labour. Instead, she has signed up -- using a friend as a proxy -- so that she can help oust Corbyn should the time come:

'So I have secured my stake and my say. Being a Tory member I can’t join under my own name (and the Labour machine could spit me out after this column), but I have signed up a friend as my proxy. A sum of £4 a month seems small beer for the chance to help change the direction of a party that, though not my own, matters to the direction of the country.'

It seems #ToriesForCorbyn will now have to compete with #ToriesAgainstCorbyn...