Q. A good friend of my husband’s always addresses me as ‘Gorgeous’ or ‘my sweetie’, as he does many of his other female friends. After two years it is starting to grate and I would like him to start calling me by my given name. How can I get the message across without hurting his feelings? I can’t ask my husband to say anything as he is just too tactless and his friend does mean well, even though his efforts to be suave and charming fall flat. His friend considers himself a ladies’ man but sadly just doesn’t have the ‘necessary’ to carry it off!
S.W., Swadlincote
A. If your concern is that other people might consider the two of you an item, then do not worry. Your body language will indicate that this is not the case. Let the old buffer carry on with these harmless endearments.
Q. We don’t usually have many visitors to our weekend hideaway as we come down from London for a rest. However, I recently had a diplomat from an EU country to stay and a good friend invited us (and him) to a country house opera and prepared a sumptuous meal. His thank-you email the following Monday said ‘…and please thank so and so for the opera’. I politely replied giving her address, suggesting he might want to drop our opera hostess a note. He said he preferred not to and instead I should simply do the thanking. I think this is very naughty. What do you say Mary?
D.J., Mildenhall, Wiltshire
A. Email the diplomat back saying, ‘Don’t worry if you are busy. I’ve got some time on my hands these days so I’ll do it for you. Just send me a sheet of your letterhead and sign the bottom of the page and I’ll fill in the words for you. It will have to be typed faute de mieux, but that will be better than nothing. I wouldn’t want her to fall out with us.’ In this way you will give your friend a short sharp shock and he will undoubtedly write the thank-you letter himself.
Q. Is it permitted to own a Patek Philippe and yet not be one of the super rich? Apparently not. Forty-seven years ago my father gave me one for my 21st birthday. Now Patek Philippe’s London agent estimates £1,690 for routine overhaul and repairs. Am I wrong to think this is unreasonable? Might not there be some dedicated specialist who would do the same work for a fair amount?
R.T., London
A. I spoke to you by telephone and gleaned the information that your watch is a vintage model. I then spoke to a former editor of Patek Philippe magazine. He told me that because vintage Patek Philippes have increased in value by 110 times in the last 50 years, while vintage Jaguars have only increased by 44 times, your watch is an investment worth preserving. If you cannot afford the £1,690 yourself, it would be well worth borrowing it to pay for the repair. ‘There is no cheap way of doing it,’ he tells me. ‘It is like trying to get a Fabergé egg repaired by a non-specialist.’ This former editor also supplied the interesting nugget that the Dalai Lama is the only non-specialist known to be able to repair his own Patek Philippe watch.
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