Last week I went for an interview with the Irish Guards. My father and his father were both in this regiment. I put on my smartest suit and grabbed a tie from my dad’s dressing room. The interview went well but when I got home my father was absolutely horrified, exclaiming that I was wearing an ‘Old Guards’ tie, something sacred and reserved only for those who have served. I had had no idea that was what it was and, while the recruiting officer did not mention it, I can only imagine his dismay that I was wearing one. Should I email him to apologise? Or would it make things worse?
— Name and address withheld
A. There is never any harm in follow-up emails after interviews and, since the recruiting officer will certainly have noticed the tie, it will be good for you to flag up your delayed realisation of your error and to apologise. By pre-empting a possible no, you will improve your chances of a yes.
Q. How can I find out if a young man who seems suitable for my daughter is single? The two overlapped briefly when his team visited my house as part of an ongoing project and I saw a spark there. Although he will come again, my daughter no longer lives at home. Before I arrange for her to visit while he is here, I need to know whether or not he is single. I can’t ask other members of the team as any sort of pressure could kill it. Nor would I dream of revealing my plan to my daughter.
— Name and address withheld
A. Next time the team comes, chatter pleasantly to all. Once alone with the favourite, produce a luxury good of the sort that only a woman would want — such as a pair of Wolford tights — saying casually: ‘I offered these to my daughter but she turned them down.
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