Dear Mary: How can I lie about my age and still use my Senior Railcard?

Q. I was not brought up in England and don’t appear in Who’s Who. This means that there is no printed record of my date of birth. I’m not vain, but have good reason to believe the work I do would dry up if my age became known. (I look about 50.) The point of my writing is that I now have a Senior Railcard but hardly dare use it in case the collector comes while I am sitting with neighbours or potential clients. Twice I have pre-empted having to show the card while sitting next to such people by walking through the train on the pretext of asking the inspector a question, then showing him my ticket and railcard so he doesn’t ask me for it back at the seat. But this is unsustainable. Any suggestions?
— Name withheld, Exeter

A. Buy a Network Railcard (£30) and use that instead of your Senior Railcard. Flash it openly. This card is available to all ages and provides identical benefits to the Senior Railcard, i.e. one third off the cost of the fare (with the same time restrictions). It would profit all rail travellers to have a look at the Network Railcard map. Much of southern England from as far north as King’s Lynn, Worcester and Bedford down to the coast falls within the card’s remit. Ditto from Exeter in the west to Ramsgate in the east.

Q. I sent a drunken text to a man I am not sure is that keen on me, but who is dating me when he comes to London. I am obsessed by him. Now having read the text while sober I am deeply embarrassed. What should I do? He is much older than I am.