Help! I’ve got class envy

The summer holidays were a washout as far as my children are concerned, because we had to cancel our trip to Norway when I discovered two of their passports had expired. But in an effort to make it up to them, I managed to squeeze in a trip to Salcombe last weekend. Unfortunately, I failed to factor in the eye-watering expense of spending two days in the south Devon coastal town. It cost me the best part of £2,000.

I’ve had cheaper meals at a London restaurant with three Michelin stars – and this was a beach shack

Salcombe must be the most expensive seaside resort in Britain. For instance, a seafood platter for two at the Crab Shed, where I booked lunch on Sunday, will set you back £148.A single crab is £32.50, even though you can look up from your table and see small children pulling crabs out of the sea by the bucketload. No doubt the mark-up is because only highly skilled chefs can bung one of these crustaceans into a pan of boiling water. Caroline’s dish of linguine in tomato sauce, the ingredients of which cannot have cost more than £2.50, came to £18.50. I’ve had cheaper meals at London restaurants with three Michelin stars, and this was essentially a no-frills beach shack with a couple of teenage girls on waitress duty.

The reason we ended up in Salcombe is because Caroline and I were invited to stay by friends who’d taken a house there for a week. We wanted to go, but thought it would be mean to leave our children behind, not least because it’s Ludo’s last weekend before he goes off to university. So we rented an Airbnb for the kids, then concluded it would be easier to stay in it ourselves rather than shuttle between the two properties.