Interconnect

How to start saving Britain in ten minutes

David Cameron does not need a majority to start radical reform. He needs to send a few emails. Here are some suggestions

issue 13 March 2010

The work begins
Subject: No time to lose
Date: Friday, 7 May 2010 14:28
From: David Cameron
To: Sir Gus O’Donnell, Cabinet Secretary

Dear Gus,

The Queen has just invited me to form a government. I’m sending this on by BlackBerry in the car, because there is a degree of urgency. Our country has been badly broken by 13 years of bad government. There is, literally, not a moment to lose in fixing it. The Queen has asked me to govern for up to five years, and mentioned to me that her father saw our country win a world war in six years. Her point: that five years is plenty to save our nation. That is precisely what I intend to do.

I may not have won the majority that I had hoped for. But I do not need legislation to achieve most of my reform plans: I can do this by email. I don’t see why we need to have endless meetings, when a simple instruction can suffice. I will not tolerate over-complication: anyone who attempts this will be removed.

Under Labour, the average minister lasted 14 months in the job: the Civil service could, and did, stall on reform they did not want to implement. Under the Conservatives, this will not be tolerated.

Yesterday, I won a mandate from nine million people for an agenda that I will implement as a matter of urgency. I will expect it to be treated as such by every department under your command. Anyone who stalls, or fails to make the requisite progress, will be moved.

One final point. In 1981, Oliver Letwin was drafted in to No. 10 by Keith Joseph to introduce what is now Michael Gove’s plans for school liberalisation. They were talked out of this by the Civil Service, who introduced 101 reasons why it could not be enacted. The result: three decades of substandard education doled out to the children of those who could not afford to move to the catchment areas where the good schools are. This is a social, political and human tragedy – induced by Civil Service obfuscation. It will not be tolerated this time around.

We’re due to meet in an hour in No. 10 – but I didn’t want to waste the sixty minutes. I hope this gives you an idea of the speed that I, and those who elected me, expect you to move. We have spoken in the run-up to the election about my agenda. Now is the time to implement it.

Yours,
David

The regional development agencies die today
Re: First cut is the deepest
Date: Friday, 7 May 2010 14:35
From: David Cameron
To: Secretary of State, Department for Business, Innovation and Skills

Dear Ken,

For nearly ten years now the party has been wrestling with the abolition of one of John Prescott’s more bizarre creations – the Regional Development Agencies. Their abolition need not be so complicated and, as my minister for the department that has oversight of them, I would like you to bump them off and give up that part of your department’s budget.

Business leaders have been calling for their abolition for years. Indeed, considering how few businesses have actually received help from the RDAs, it’s no wonder. Billions of pounds have been taken off small businesses over the past decade, filtered through the countless layers of RDA bureaucracy, only then to be offered back to a few as grants.

They’ve got to go Ken.

Cameron’s first salary circular
Subject: URGENT — Your salary
Date: Friday, 7 May 2010 14:35
From: David Cameron
To: 323+ UK public officials who earn more than me

Good morning,

If you are receiving this message, it is because you draw a salary, at the expense of British taxpayers, which, pro rata, is equal to or in excess of my own. I don’t know about you, but I certainly feel that my current level of remuneration — £187,750 — is plenty and, as I’m sure you’re aware, I have immediately taken a 5 per cent pay cut. I’m not sure, however, that you will give your own pay similar rigorous scrutiny during these tough fiscal times.

So, please consider this letter as a formal request for me to receive from you, by close of business on Monday, a completed version of the following sentence in 100 words or less: ‘I deserve to draw a salary from taxpayers, greater than that of the democratically elected Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, because…’ Your answers will be analysed and weighed for merit but, obviously, if you decide immediately to take a pay cut to £1 less than me, I’m sure our employees, the British people, will appreciate that very much.

Finally, I reserve the right to publish you answer in full in one week’s time.

With warm wishes,

The Prime Minister

Reform of the charitable sector
Subject: Transparency
Date: Friday, May 7, 2010 14:35
From: David Cameron
To: Dame Suzi Leather, Chair of the Charity Commission

Dear Dame Suzi.

This is the Prime Minister. Without doubt, charities are going to play an increasingly important role in the delivery of services to the vulnerable in the next few years. It is therefore vital that the sector is run as efficiently as possible. We have noticed that since you became chair of the Charity Commission in 2006 the number of charities you investigate has fallen dramatically. We also note that both your investigation procedures and rulings regarding the probity of charities leave, how can I put it, a significant amount to be desired.

In particular, I refer to the independence of the judgments you make – you seem to be investigating organisations as prosecutors, and then deciding their fate as jury, before sanctioning their punishment as judge. That is absurd – there should be a separation of powers. And there is.

As you know, a few years ago the Tribunals Service was empowered as an independent court to rule on charities’ behaviour. However, there is an increasing body of evidence which suggests that you have failed to recommend it as the first arbiter of charity law, relying instead on your own ‘internal’ procedures. That is unacceptable. You will immediately recognise the primacy of the independent judicial presence in your sector.

Secondly, I would like to make reference to your internal procedures. I know that incomplete record-keeping in your commission, reliance on hearsay, and other failings have all been the subject of criticism from Judges. So, with immediate effect, you must put in place formal guidance for appropriate record keeping and conduct during your investigations.

You will soon be contacted by one of my ministers to schedule a meeting for one weeks’ time in order to establish how effectively you have addressed these problems. If you have not, then, obviously, your position will become untenable.

Yours sincerely,

David Cameron

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