The debate about Swedish hospitality started on Reddit – a forum otherwise known for such profound discussions as ‘Can you watch porn on a hotel’s wifi?’ – and has now gone global. Even the New York Times has weighed in with an article entitled: ‘Do Swedish People Feed Their Guests?’
The whole fuss is difficult to comprehend from a Swedish point of view
Suddenly, it seems, the world is talking about Sweden’s lack of domestic warmth. Here in Stockholm, the buzz was first brushed off as a joke. When the subject started trending on Twitter, it was in all seriousness thought to be the potential work of Russian troll factories; professional provocateurs spreading disinformation and propaganda.
The famously neutral Sweden has just taken the historic decision to apply for Nato membership. Defence experts have warned us and fellow applicant country Finland that we’re facing a dangerous period of all manner of threats and provocations – from Russian military jets trespassing on our airspace to more subtle operations, aiming to tarnish the Nordic countries’ reputations. But really, would the Kremlin bother with meatballs and pickled herring? Or is that exactly what they want us to think? (It’s very much a paranoid Cold War vibe here).
The whole fuss is difficult to comprehend from a Swedish point of view, not least because we’re already seen as frosty and aloof. If surveys showed Mediterranean countries like Italy or Spain scraping the bottom of the hospitality league, that would be news.
Also, are you sure you want to eat a full Swedish meal? We don’t need Moscow to tell us that our best dishes are all imported.
Ask any Swede in a relatively large city what they’ve dined on over the weekend and it won’t be our traditional sturdy fare of meat and potatoes. Rather, it’s Thai takeaway or homemade tacos on Friday, sushi or a Chicken Korma on Saturday, and the classic Italian hungover treat of greasy pizza (or a Turkish kebab) come Sunday.
In TasteAtlas.com‘s June 2022 ranking of the world’s best cuisines, Sweden doesn’t make the list. Bolivia, Uruguay and Slovenia, perhaps not renowned as global gourmand Meccas, hog the final places of 48, 49 and 50 respectively. (Italy, naturalmente, grabs the number one spot.)
But, as stories take on their own life online and move further and further away from the original piece, it should be pointed out that #Swedengate started as criticism of the perceived habit of not inviting your kids’ playmates to dine with the family. In other words, a specific situation that has little to do with the adult world. I can assure you that Swedes do offer their guests coffee, snacks, dinner, dessert, wine, whatever they like. We’re not total barbarians up here, and the courtesy of letting guests slaughter their own meats is thankfully behind us.
I’ve lost count of how many Swedes announced, tongue-in-cheek on June 6 that they would celebrate our National Day by not inviting their children’s friends to dinner. But is there truth to that claim? Yes. And no. It varies wildly. Foreign-born writers have told of their culture shock at encountering the phenomenon (‘in our home, not feeding guests was taboo!’).
Being born and raised in Sweden by Swedish parents, I remember it clearly from my childhood, but not with dismay. I loved remaining in my friend’s rooms reading instead of being forced to make stiff conversations with their parents.
And this, of course, is the core of #Swedengate – hard individualism challenged by foreign, more social cultures and the ensuing clashes of everyday customs. Much is made in European nationalist circles of our ‘wave of imported crime’ (rape as a native Swedish tradition going back to Viking times is conveniently forgotten).
The hospitality debate is a reminder that some of our less charming Swedish traits have been softened by the advent of multiculturalism. We should be thankful for it.
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