Merry Christmas – but not for those who have earned a place on my naughty list. From Jacinda Ardern to Carrie’s critics, here’s a catalogue of all those who must do better in 2022:
Ant and Dec. Nope. Still don’t know which is which. Each needs to follow normal practice and use a Christian name/surname combination that eliminates all confusion, e.g, Brian Cox.Nigel Farage’s broadcast career. His GB News show is popular but it’s a waste of his unique power, namely the ability to inflict near-fatal damage on an institution from within. Give him a peerage.
Jacinda Ardern. The toothsome fear-monger seems hellbent on turning her country into a control-freak state.
Fake Christmas trees. Enjoy your imported conifer while you can. The annual slaughter of healthy young evergreens to celebrate a Christian festival will be banned within the decade.
29.7 seconds. The longest period of silence ever observed by a vegan without telling someone they’re a vegan.
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