JANUARY In Iraq Sunni insurgents targeted the politically dominant Shiites; Iranians were accused of supporting Shiite militants. Austria, taking up the EU presidency, accused Britain of being the ‘Sick Man of Europe’. Labour floundered over its Education Bill.
FEBRUARY Dr Rowan Williams announced his retirement to a monastery in Anatolia after the greater part of the Anglican Communion, led by Nigeria, broke away from Canterbury over the consecration of a lesbian bishop in Canada. Sir David Frost was prosecuted under anti-terrorist legislation for his involvement with the new al-Jazeera international television channel.
MARCH Israeli forces made retaliatory air strikes on Gaza following a wave of suicide bombings during the elections that brought Mr Ariel Sharon to power at the head of a coalition dominated by his Kadima (‘Forward’) party. England looked set to win the Test series in India until the bombings in Bombay, during the second Test at Nagpur, prompted the squad to return home due to ‘outstanding issues around health and safety’.
APRIL Mr Tony Blair, the Prime Minister, was kept in hospital for ‘tests’. Mr John Prescott said, ‘The Prime Minister remains in administration. As long as and until when, I will continue to be in charge.’ House prices fell sharply. The prison where Saddam Hussein was being held was destroyed by rocket fire on the eve of his execution.
MAY Londoners congratulated themselves on showing a ‘Spirit of the Blitz’ when the whole Underground system was closed on health and safety grounds after structural faults were discovered on the Northern Line.
JUNE Turkish forces occupied the Greek island of Samos after Greece’s victory in the Eurovision Song Contest with ‘Ne, Ne, Ne’. Madonna was crushed by a camel during a photoshoot for her new album Tantric Kabala.
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