Restaurants | 27 October 2007

St Alban, 4–12 Regent Street, London SW1

St Alban is the latest restaurant from Chris Corbin and Jeremy King, who have almost mythic status as restaurateurs, and rightly so. They are, after all, the team that at various times have been behind The Ivy, Le Caprice, J. Sheekey and The Wolseley but never Garfunkel’s, which is weird but, hey, if it ain’t broke why fix it? This newest opening is on Regent Street but not on the groovy bit. It’s on the sombre, shopless bit south of Piccadilly Circus, and on the ground floor of a block so dreary and anonymous I miss it several times. At one point I even end up in a different restaurant entirely. Is this St Alban? ‘No.’ You’re not St Alban? ‘No.’ Who are you then? ‘Divo.’ Not St Alban? ‘No.’ Are you sure? ‘Yes.’ Quite sure, because I have been up and down the street several times? ‘Yes. We are quite sure.’ This is how I knew I was in the wrong place. I am quick to catch on.

Anyway, I eventually locate St Alban — good tip: it’s opposite a branch of Rymans — and go in, as why wouldn’t I, after all the trouble I’ve had finding it? That would be insane. Inside, it’s OK, but a bit disappointingly NCP-ish via a BA transit lounge and some kind of corporate headquarters. The room is low and dim, the lights are recessed, and the seating is all luridly coloured banquettes. It isn’t sexy or glossy or any of the things I’d expected but, wow, the toilets are almost shockingly wonderful. They’re all metal-studded and shiny and each has an automatic flush such that as soon as you stand up, whoosh, it’s off. It’s hours of fun — up, down, up, down — or would have been, but I have two friends with me and after a while one knocks at the door and says, ‘We think you can stop playing with the flush now.’