Spectator competition winners: odes to Alexa and Siri

For the latest competition you were challenged to submit an ode to Alexa or Siri. A recent study by Unesco, entitled ‘I’d Blush if I Could’ (Siri’s alarmingly coquettish response to the phrase ‘You’re a slut/bitch’), claimed that submissive female-voiced virtual assistants perpetuate negative, outdated gender stereotypes, and this assignment did seem to bring out the unreconstructed roguish side in some. You know who you are. Honourable mentions go to Frank Upton and Alan Millard, who were narrowly outflanked by the winners below. They earn £25 each.

Chris O’Carroll Alexa, you’re the sunshine of my life. You answer wisely like an honest wife. ‘You Are the Sunshine of My Life’, a song by Stevie Wonder, is three minutes long.

Alexa, are you like a summer’s day? That’s what a poet might be moved to say. Sonnet 18 by William Shakespeare, who Wrote poems and is a well-known playwright, too.

Alexa, are you are like a red, red rose, A creature more of poetry than prose? The term ‘prose poetry’, it has been said, Contains two words, but needs just one instead.

Alexa, tell me how to count the ways I love thee.