Nick Cohen Nick Cohen

The cruelty of the care home visit ban

(Photo: iStock)

The loneliest pandemic deaths are in ‘care’ homes. Old people with dementia and people of all ages with severe mental disabilities do not understand why their families have stopped visiting them. The people they loved, often the only people they would allow to brush their teeth, dress and feed them, have vanished for no reason they can understand.

They stop eating, they self-harm, they withdraw into themselves, and they die in extraordinary numbers. Their final moments must include the thought that those they loved most have abandoned them.

Their families, meanwhile, suffer the sadness of never being able to say goodbye. The comments attached to a crowdfunder for a legal action – to order Matt Hancock to find a smidgeon of compassion in what passes for his soul and let people visit their loved ones in care homes – read like a modern Book of Lamentations.

‘My dad has Alzheimer’s and is profoundly deaf. We communicate by my writing on a whiteboard whilst standing outside a downstairs window at the Home. However, I was told this week window visits will now not be allowed.’

‘This is imprisonment. Imprisoned by dementia. Now imprisoned by the government. Thank you for challenging this injustice.’

‘I ache to see my sister – she is declining into a state of oblivion – hard to accept at any point – without the comfort only I can provide it is beyond cruel’

‘I have seen my mother only once face to face since 12 March despite her living only two miles from my home. We miss each other hugely and I can’t bear to think we face another six months like this.’

On and on it goes. Mothers who cannot see their children. Children whose mothers devoted themselves to their care who cannot now help when help is most needed.

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