Fraser Nelson

The Gord’s Prayer

The Gord's Prayer
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Guido has run a list of what happens when you type "Gordon Brown is" into Google. It suggests a long line of search strings based on what other people have entered. None are printable here - except the second one. "Gordon Brown is my shepherd." Now, you might ask, who on earth is searching for this? Well, it's the start to a poem that was "doing the rounds" (as Damian McBride would say), a kind of Gord's Prayer. Gordon Brown poems are a curious phenomenon, and I am sent them now and again by my News of the World readers: all hilarious, none printable. (One opened "Gordon Brown's from Scotty Town, his government's a farce..." I can leave you to guess the rest). Anyway, here is the rest of the "Shepherd" poem - this one, at least, is printable. Who says our Prime Minister isn't inspirational?

Gordon Brown is my shepherd, I shall not work.

He leadeth me beside the still factories.

He restoreth my faith in the political opposition.

He guideth me in the path of unemployment.

Yea, though I wait for my dole,

I own the bank that refuses me.

He has annointed my income with taxes,

My expenses runneth over my pay.

Surely poverty and hard times will follow me all the days of his term.

From hence forth, we will live all the days of our lives in a rented home with an overseas landlord.

P.S. Dizzy did this a few weeks back - and his results show that "Gordon Brown is my shepherd" was not listed then. Evidently growing in popularity...

Written byFraser Nelson

Fraser Nelson is the editor of The Spectator. He is also a columnist with The Daily Telegraph, a member of the advisory board of the Centre for Social Justice and the Centre for Policy Studies.

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