The New Normal Festival shows how theatre could return

So the madness continues. Planes full of passengers are going everywhere. Theatres full of ghosts are going bust. My first press night since March took place at a monumental Victorian building in Wandsworth where concerts are staged in an open-air courtyard. The entry process was less fussy than I’d expected. I didn’t need my phone and there was no ‘track and trace’ nonsense. A masked official aimed a ray gun at my face and showed me a reading — 36.4ºC. I’d passed the temperature test. He then pointed me towards a hand sanitiser. ‘Is it compulsory?’ I said politely. A look of fear crossed his eyes, as if violence were about to erupt, and he meekly repeated his request that I soap down my mits. The sanitising fluid, surprisingly cold, smelled like cheap vodka and it evaporated within a minute leaving my skin feeling delicate and silky.

In the courtyard, the staff wore masks. The spectators didn’t. Chairs were set out in pairs, or in larger clusters of threes, fours and fives. These large groups of seats were for spectators who lived together. Or who claimed to live together. There was no system of policing or double-checking. The venue’s capacity was significantly boosted by permitting larger ‘family’ groups to sit together. Outdoor venues like the Globe could use this method to bring in a decent crowd.

Before the show began, the players were visible warming up in a side corridor. No face masks for the thesps. A senior usher with an authoritative manner went around checking the seats to ensure that the correct distancing procedures were being observed. Then he whipped off his mask and introduced himself as the troupe leader. ‘Theatre is back!’ he announced. The crowd cheered ecstatically.