From the Lords to the Commons: the state opening of parliament is truly a bicameral affair. Fresh from diadem-spotting in the Upper House, Mr S headed down to the other place after lunch, to hear the Loyal Address. This is the parliamentary procedure used to formally open the debate on the King’s Speech, with the proposer typically a eminent grandee/crusty old windbag and the seconder a rising star/ambitious young so-and-so (delete as appropriate).
Today the honour of proposing the first Loyal Address of King Charles’s reign fell to Sir Robert Goodwill, the long-serving, long-suffering Member for Scarborough. In an entertaining speech, Sir Robert told the House of the ups and downs of his parliamentary career. One highlight was the 2010 election campaign, when posters went up in his Scarborough constituency, asking ‘What is the difference between Robert Goodwill and a supermarket trolley?’ At the end of the campaign, the local newspaper concluded: ‘A supermarket trolley has a mind of its own.’
Having been here 18 years now, Goodwill joked that he now knows the answer: ‘The difference between an MP and a supermarket trolley is that there is a physical limit to the amount of food and drink you can get into a supermarket trolley.’ He also took a pop at Liz Truss, saying of the Tories’ record on diversity ‘We have had three Conservative women prime ministers. Assuming the most recent one counts, of course.’ But it was his anecdote about Truss’s predecessor that really brought the House down. Summarising his speech, Goodwill told MPs that:
Finally, an absolute true story from the 2019 winter general election. And I heard your strictures about being truthful to the House. This absolutely happened. One of the strongest Labour areas in my patch is a former council estate called Eastfield. We usually go there early in the campaign to get it out of the way. This time it was different; people actually crossing the street to shake my hand. They had voted for Brexit and wanted to get it done and were sick of being ignored.
My wife Maureen knocked on one door. The lady who answered was effusive in her admiration for Prime Minister Johnson. Arriving myself, I asked her why she was so enthusiastic. She said: “Boris is one of us”. When I politely pointed out he’d been to Eton and Oxford, she replied “You don’t understand. He had a row with his wife and the police came round. That’s what happens on this street all the time.”
Nice to see there’s still some Goodwill for Boris left in parliament…
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