Who will sing for Labour?

The Independent’s gossip column reports that Labour is having some trouble recruiting celebrity talent to us annual fundraising dinner:

“Party press officers insist that they have a “surprise singing performer” to compound [Eddie Izard’s] credentials. Who could it be? The usual cast of characters (Mick Hucknall, the Bee Gees, Heather Small) refuse to respond to Pandora’s advances.