Q. Previously a long-term and content single man, earlier in the year I began a relationship with a wonderful girl, despite warnings from friends that she had a reputation for suddenly and crushingly breaking the hearts of a string of boyfriends. I reassured myself and my friends that this was different and special. Months later, and happily committed to what I thought was a long future with her, with no signs to the contrary, inevitably I have been tossed aside via WhatsApp messages and a phone call. How can I avoid the pitying looks from those who warned me?
— Name withheld, London SW3
A. As soon as you enter a room where one of the likely offenders is present, move swiftly forward to give a lengthy hug of greeting wherein neither of you can see the other’s facial expression. Disarm them by some vigorous tickling. The surprise will pre-empt the delivery of a pitying look, and it will also unnerve — and even irritate — your victim. Sympathy will suddenly seem inappropriate.
Q. Your correspondent J.A.(27 October) complains of the overt enthusiasm of vegans when eating their sanctimonious meat-free dishes. I occasionally stay with a friend who has just become vegan. Is it acceptable for a house guest to bring a contribution of non-vegan food if she offers to cook it herself?
— L.B., London NW1
A. I have consulted the vegan author Lucy Ogilvie-Grant. Lucy decrees: ‘Vegetablists smart with feelings of humiliation, having endured relentless digs about “rabbit food”, and it’s consequently very common for them to overexaggerate the deliciousness of non-animal food. However it’s also true that when you stop eating meat regularly, vegetables do become more palatable. It is not acceptable to cook your own carnivorous meals while staying as a guest.

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