Dear Mary…
Q. I have recently inherited a beautiful tapestry from an uncle of whom I was particularly fond, and who, I believe, was rather fond of me. While my cousin — who is shortly to move into her late father’s house — is happy to respect his wishes and let me have the tapestry, her husband is less enthusiastic and is more than a little exercised as to what to put in the place of this work, which occupies almost all of one wall of the dining-room. That empty wall will make me feel uncomfortable every time I visit. I get on very well with my cousin and would dearly like to do something to help them out, but so far have drawn a blank.
S.V.Z., London SW10
A. A new technological development will ease your distress. For many years some of the grandest houses in the land have been selling off their Old Masters and commissioning copies which only the keenest eye could distinguish from the real thing. And now a firm that makes copies of tapestries is at hand. Zardi & Zardi use new technology to print on to fabric. In addition to their own range of wall-hangings, they offer a bespoke service and have recently made copies of the Venus and Adonis series at Houghton Hall for the Marquess of Cholmondeley to hang while the originals are being restored. Why not commission a copy of your ‘heirloom’ and make a present of it to your cousin? Her husband should feel more than satisfied, since it will be you who pays the mammoth insurance bill each year and not him.
Q. I have been puzzled by the lengthy correspondence on serving and eating breakfast in pyjamas or other night attire. One would not permit servants to serve meals in such a state, so why should this be considered acceptable for a host? A simpler solution must be for hosts and guests to perform ablutions and dress before descending to the ground floor. Guests who sleep naked would not be disadvantaged by this more appropriate convention, which would also represent a welcome departure from a slovenly and unhygienic practice unfortunately reflective of the times in which we live.
J.L.L., Exeter
A. I am afraid your point of view is Pooterish. When the guests know each other very well, breakfast-eating while still clad in nightwear is practised in many of the most civilised house parties, for the simple reason that caffeine addicts are too tired to put clothes on before they have had some coffee. To endorse this view, may I refer to the anecdote about the philanthropist James Edward, who once came down to breakfast while staying at Leixlip Castle with the Guinnesses to find everyone at the table in their nightwear? ‘Oh excuse me!’ cried the fully dressed James, and he went back upstairs, to reappear a few moments later dressed in his own nightclothes.
Q. Have I sent my Christmas party invitations out too early? I detect a scornful note in some of the RSVPs.
Name and address withheld, London W2
A. It is common to send out invitations more than six weeks before an event. An additional stigma attaches to mentioning Christmas too early.
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