Society

Sam Leith

Coronavirus has made amateur mathematicians of us all

‘What is the point of learning maths? When do you ever actually need it? How does it ever affect your life?’ That’s the frequent complaint of my school-age children, labouring over their times tables and number bonds. It was my complaint as I struggled to tell median from mean, or sine from cosine. Well. Now we have a nation and a world bewitched and terrified in equal measure by a ground-level demonstration of what an exponential function does. Our entire society is being shaped for a generation by that elegant, predictable, horrifyingly steepening curve. One shred of comfort in this catastrophe is the thought that no journalist will ever again

Rod Liddle

If anything is ‘essential’ right now, it’s cigarettes

The owners of my local grocery shop, a mile or so from my house, very kindly sell me cigarettes in blocks of 200 at a time — and they have also delivered them to my house during this lockdown. This is useful for several reasons. Most importantly it aids my self-isolation programme. But it also minimises the risk of me being caught in the shop by a lurking Matt Hancock or perhaps a chief constable of the police, anxious to punish people who may be purchasing goods which they do not consider ‘essential’. If anything is essential during this time of compulsory boredom, it is cigarettes and alcohol. I have

I’m walking round Britain – in my back garden

What’s the best way to keep in shape during the lockdown? That’s the First World problem I’ve been using to distract me during these strange, distressing times. My wife and teenage children are doing online workouts, but that looks far too tiring. Instead, I’m walking round Britain — in my back garden. I got the idea from a walking trail called Walk the Planets, in Ruislip Woods, not far from where I live. It’s a round trip of about two miles, which doubles as a tour of the solar system. At a scale of five billion to one, Mercury, Venus, Earth and Mars are barely a hundred yards apart (on

Rory Sutherland

My Japanese toilet has made me a lockdown hero

Compared with every other household chore, progress in bum-wiping has been glacially slow. It’s only in living memory that schools and institutions stopped using something called Izal, a box of medicated toilet wipes similar in texture to greaseproof paper, and thus spectacularly ill-suited to its purpose. It was characteristic of the Britain of my childhood, where things were made gratuitously unpleasant on purpose, since to do anything nice was seen as effeminate. The Muslim world is far ahead of us here. In most Islamic countries a toilet cubicle comes with a bum gun — a kind of handheld spray. Yet in the supposedly enlightened Anglophone world we think dry paper

Toby Young

Britain needs Boris, the extraordinary man I’ve known for 35 years

As I write, Boris Johnson is in intensive care at St Thomas’ Hospital, battling with coronavirus. For someone with such an unwavering belief in his own destiny, this must be profoundly difficult. He is a man who’s beaten the odds over and over: to become mayor of London in a Labour city, to lead the Leave campaign to victory in the teeth of overwhelming opposition, to become prime minister in spite of all his personal baggage, and then to win the largest Conservative majority since 1987. Here is a man who cannot stare into the jaws of defeat without grabbing hold of victory with both hands. Yet the odds of

Our exile in NW1

Laikipia The sweetest sound to me now is the dawn chorus of birdsong at home on the farm. I lay awake in bed and listened, as a light rain fell on the coconut thatch above me. When I walked out into the garden the three dogs burst out of the house to go off exploring. While I made coffee in the kitchen, our cats Omar and Bernini rubbed against my legs until I fed them and then in walked Long John Silver the orphaned calf, looking for a bowl of milk. I headed out to the crush where the herds were coming in to be dipped. Cattle were mooing, the

What is the true cost of the coronavirus lockdown?

Covid-19 is a public health crisis. At least, this is what the doctors, epidemiologists and clinicians who command the air waves are telling us. They’re right, of course. But it isn’t only that: it’s an economic and social crisis too – and yet social scientists have hardly been heard from. They don’t seem to be influencing policy that much either. When the UK government says its decisions are guided by the science, they appear to be referring only to the science of transmission of the virus and its direct consequences for health. And even health is narrowly defined here: as mortality risks in the next few months. The only graphs

John Connolly

Has the UK ignored its own expert advice on facemasks?

The use of facemasks in the fight against coronavirus has become a contentious topic in recent weeks, as different countries have debated how much difference they make when worn by the general public. After flirting with the idea of recommending the widespread use of masks, the WHO this week stuck with its guidance, which says that only healthcare workers, people who are sick and showing symptoms, and people caring for the potentially infected should wear masks. The UK has taken a more hard-line approach. Since the beginning of the outbreak, it has said that even sick people showing symptoms shouldn’t wear masks at home, as they are most effective when

How to find a safe way out of the coronavirus lockdown

We are in a big mess, there is no doubt. We’re battling a deadly virus, the Prime Minister is in hospital and the country is in lockdown. A less optimistic person could argue that all is lost. The constant howling from our media does little to help – portraying death and destruction nightly on our screens is just too harrowing for many to watch. Reporting daily numbers is necessary, but there should be a much greater focus on trends as any schoolboy mathematician will tell you. New infections are levelling off. It is clear that we are at the plateau phase of incidence with the numbers bouncing around a bit.

The tragedy waiting to happen in our care homes

My grandmother, who has suffered from a major stroke, is bed ridden and barely compos mentis. She no longer has the cognitive ability to enjoy the relative intimacy of video calls on WhatsApp from well-wishers, or the simple pleasure of a Skype call with close family and friends. During this period of social distancing, her loneliness – now that visitors are not permitted in the home to prevent infection – is heart-breaking. A comforting hug or kiss on the cheek, in the brief windows when she is awake, is out of the question. Even a carer tucking her in at night could be fatal. Naturally, those with vulnerable relatives like

Alex Massie

A note to fellow lockdown lethargics

Strange times, these. Dull and unsettling in equal measure. Much of life feels as though it is stuck in some interminable holding pattern, waiting for permission to land and move on. The days drag, even for those of us accustomed to working from home. But the city is a dreary place, for now, stripped of most of its conveniences and opportunities.  Worse still, there are professional problems. This is a game in which you’re always supposed to have a view and the hotter it is the better. Incentives favour certainty; if in doubt double down on your lack of doubt. Bets should not be hedged; everything is a triumph or

How to read coronavirus graphs

Dominic Cummings placed a job advert back in January calling for data scientists, statisticians and modellers. Since then, the coronavirus epidemic has made all of us ‘weirdos and misfits’ in our growing obsession with data. Everyone now has opinions on the latest coronavirus statistics, whether it’s South Korean test numbers, German fatality rates or Italian regional differences. The latest data visualisations get shared widely across the internet. But how should we make sense of them? To a professional mathematician like me who gives lectures about probability and uncertainty, the rise of the epidemic modellers is somewhat bewildering. Compared to the problems I normally work on, modelling the epidemic is both incredibly

We need a ‘Big Science’ approach for developing corona vaccines

As more and more countries expand their testing for Covid-19, from testing for diagnosis and frontline medical staff to the worried well, the surge in demand for test kits has led to global shortages that have left some countries racing to secure supplies. If the world doesn’t get organised, the same will be true of Covid-19 vaccines. More than 62 candidate vaccines are currently in development, but without global coordination, there is a danger that we could end up facing immediate shortages and a vaccine that is merely the first to be approved, rather than the most effective or safest. We need to set aside nationalistic and financial interests when

A rare speech from an isolated Queen

Once upon a time, a speech by the Queen had the capacity to surprise. Only a handful of her trusted advisors would have been privy to its content prior to its delivery. Elizabeth, a Head of State who has thrived for decades by remaining above the political fray, didn’t use to indulge in extensive pre-briefing. Such tactics were the preserve of those who relied on the ballot box – not an accident of birth, for their position. This status quo is yet another victim of Covid-19. As we settled down to watch the monarch momentarily delay an episode of the Antiques Roadshow, we had a sense of what she would

Gus Carter

The curious case of the coronavirus conviction

Last Saturday, a 41-year-old woman was arrested for what police described as ‘loitering between platforms’ at Newcastle Central station. By Monday, she had been successfully prosecuted – finding herself with a criminal conviction for breaching the newly enacted Coronavirus Act 2020. Days later, the conviction was dropped after police accepted they had misunderstood the law.  Why does all this matter? Well, clearly it’s important when law enforcement misuses some of the most draconian legislation passed in living memory. But the case tells us something else about the state of our criminal justice system. British justice, like the other parts of our constitution, is designed precisely so that failures like this do not occur.

James Delingpole

My ‘quirky’ must-see shows – and why I was never interested in The West Wing

Welcome to part two of my personal guide to the absolute must-see TV shows of the last few years. It is, as you might have already guessed, very idiosyncratic. No The Wire? Nope, ‘fraid not. I found it dreary and unintelligible. No, The West Wing? Also no, for ideological reasons. I’m simply not interested in a drama where the central premise is: ‘Just how amazing is this wise, benign left-liberal President?’ (If he were cut more from the cloth of Coolidge, Reagan or Trump, I might have been more enthusiastic.) This week, my loose theme is ‘quirky’: shows that slipped through the net and didn’t get quite the attention they

Charles Moore

The benefits of the coronavirus era

On the ‘count your blessings’ principle, it is worth making a list of benefits of the coronavirus era. These include: no aeroplane noise, no smell of hamburgers, much shorter weekend newspapers, more work for good butchers, and a temporary end to the persecutions of TV Licensing. I am wondering whether to refuse to pay my licence all over again. I am reluctant, since last time it cost me £800, but one reads that non-payment will not be pursued while the plague lasts. Even if it were, could the magistrates’ courts sit to hear the cases? This is an extract from Charles Moore’s Spectator Notes, available in this week’s magazine.

Four of the best Spectator pieces I’ve ever read

One of the things that lockdown allows you to do is not just to read but to re-read. Obviously the smart thing to do is to say that you are ‘re-reading’ vast books you haven’t actually read (Gibbon, Macaulay etc). Easier, and often more enjoyable, is to re-read pieces you remember but haven’t read for a while.  Recent days have given me a good opportunity for doing that, among much else. And perhaps I should say at the outset that the editor has not asked me to do this. I have been offered no bribes, dangled no promotions and offered not even one bottle of Pol Roger. But I simply