Magpies
‘It started with milk-bottle tops…’
More cartoons
Thursday
Legal
‘The Legal Aid cuts have had a catastrophic effect on our marriage — we’re still together.’
Swivel
Bullying
‘What’s all this about you bullying poor Michael Gove?’
Gnomes
‘How was it then?’
Brown
Foxes
‘These urban foxes are getting out of hand.’
Thursday
News
‘I hate 24-hour news.’
Tunnel 3
Shopping
‘Mum moved into the village and there are already problems: she’s too busy to babysit.’
Eurovision
‘I demand a yes/no referendum.’
Ukip 3
‘I know it’s unhealthy, but I just can’t give up voting Ukip.’
Lions
‘We’re not “in the jungle, the mighty jungle” and we’re not “sleeping tonight”, so please stop singing that song.’
Flies
‘Flies?’
Vampire
‘You can tell your friends at Ukip that this has nothing to do with him coming from Eastern Europe.’
Conspiracy
Intimacy
‘Too much Facebook, I think — I can’t be intimate in private any more.’
Annoyance
‘I’m going to have to ask you to leave, Sir. Your constant complaining about mobile phones is disturbing the other customers.’
Snake
‘I’m tempted by the apple.’
Yewtree
‘In the future, everyone will be famous for 15 minutes — and then arrested.’
