Insurance
‘Well of course I don’t have any tax or insurance — I’ve only just nicked it.’
More cartoons
Thursday
Shilling
‘Is that the Queen’s Shilling, or a redundancy payment?’
Retirement
‘I had a lovely retirement, thanks — two weeks on the Algarve.’
Thursday
Heathrow
‘Do you think that we’ll eventually leave the UK?’
Bank 3
‘I imagine you are going on the run - can I interest you in our travel insurance?’
Alice 3
‘Hang on - just going into a tunnel...’
Daleks
‘My boyfriend paid for them.’
Soup
‘The gas is off tonight, so it’s gazpacho.’
Foxhunt
‘You know it’s been a dream of mine to go fox-hunting, but it’s too expensive so I’m improvising.’
Conversations
Upgraded
‘I’ve upgraded my phone.’
Burnt
‘You idiot - you set it for 35 seconds instead of the recommended 30. It’s ruined.’
Africa
‘What’s this about, then?’
Drones 3
‘Military marchpasts aren’t the same in the era of drone warfare.’
Romans 2
‘We’ll have everlasting peace in Jerusalem once we’ve got rid of this lot.’
Cuts
‘It’s a British Army knife. Cuts all around.’
Burgered
‘Well I’ll be burgered.’
Corrupt
‘I recommend becoming corrupt.’
Thursday
Celebrity
‘How demeaning — I’ve actually heard of some of these people.’
House
‘Apparently they come as standard for all new builds.’