Romans
‘We have to move with the times, captain — mechanisation is here to stay.’

‘We have to move with the times, captain — mechanisation is here to stay.’
‘Why does my parent have to be a professional chef?’
‘Statement jumpers are everywhere this season.’
‘Today’s text is from St Paul.’
‘OK, fingers on buzzards, please.’
‘HVQLO TWXBD YZRSU JDMVN SDYGH.’
‘It’s not fair. Why should I have to fund your lifestyle choice?’
‘You’re running at full capacity! You need another in-tray.’
‘Why does every cloud look like an invasion map to you?’
‘Sorry, babe, I should have pointed out — that’s Dad’s chair.’
‘Well, if you think you’re tickling my ivories you can think again.’
‘Oh no! It’s the mummy’s curse!’
A return to the age of steam
‘Then she said those three little words that changed my life: “Buy to Rent”.’