Before you tell me how it looks
‘Before you tell me how it looks, remember I queued for three hours to buy it.’
Bernie
Thursday
Thursday
‘Uncle Andrew?’
‘Uncle Andrew?’
It’s a somewhat reduced service
‘It’s a somewhat reduced service.’
Thursday
Straight to the beach
‘So, with the lockdown relaxed, I headed straight to the beach.’
Thursday
Happiest days of your life
‘You’ll remember school as the happiest days of your life.’
Thursday
Thursday
Work from work
‘Are you sure there’s no way I can work from work?’
Thursday
I’ve been waiting for four hours
‘I’ve been waiting for four hours and I still haven’t seen a patient.’
Thursday
Burberry has arrived
‘I see the Burberry has arrived.’
That’s an awful lot of issues
‘That’s an awful lot of issues.’
Thursday
More wildlife in the garden
‘Have you noticed we’re getting more wildlife in the garden?’
Are we nearly there?
‘Are we nearly there?’
Thursday
If you find any PPE
‘If you find any PPE you get to keep it.’
Saturday
They haven’t got any of the basics
‘They haven’t got any of the basics — beer, wine, gin, vodka...’
Saturday
Closed for the emergency
‘I thought they were key workers.’
Mr Tickle and Mr Nosey
Mr Tickle and Mr Nosey have a problem with the two-metres-apart rule
What Boris meant
‘I somehow don’t believe this is what Boris meant.’
Saturday
That ought to reduce the death toll
‘That ought to reduce the death toll.’
