Matt Percival

‘If you don’t talk then I’ll be forced to hurt your feelings.’

‘I had some work done.’

'Today we are going to be learning percentages'

‘I was hoping for a strong independence woman.’

‘All he does is moan.’

‘Why are you in detention?’

‘Sue Gray cracked the civil service code’

‘It’s being analysed by sensitivity readers.’

‘I have notes.’

‘That was the spare’s bedroom.’

‘Are you standing down?’

‘I swear to tell my truth.’

‘I got an out-of-office email from the PM.’

‘I’d now like you to make a humiliating U-turn.’

‘Can you make it in dollars?’

‘Politics is back!’